Last week was one of the hardest weeks I've had in months. I'm good under pressure and find that I work really well in those conditions, but it's only when necessary. Last week, up until yesterday, felt unnecessary and I became a hopeless wreck.
There are very few outside influences that sends my anxiety off the charts. Money is one of them. I loved my job and everything that came with it, so it broke my heart when I no longer felt comfortable there after Tym's death. I blame him and the circumstances, even though he couldn't control dying. Still, he was the only person who could throw me off my perch and he did. Not having a job and not making as much money as I used to has me in a spiral of anxiety and frustration.
I missed two classes last week and that made me feel even worse because I am so content with my school schedule, but I am literally being pulled in two different directions. I can do school and not make any money or I can work and not take classes. When I started this semester, I thought I was doing what God had wanted of me, but I'm not sure anymore.
I thought about giving up last week. I thought about dropping my classes and not looking for work and instead just laying in bed and crying until I ran out of tears. I felt like being in a maze I couldn't get out of, and then I went to class on Thursday and saw an alarming video on war in my Peace Studies class.
Talk about a mindfuck.
When I came out of class that day, I felt even more hopeless than before because that feeling of defeat was on a more global scale. I was sure that the only way that things would get better was if I became President or if God just ended the world. Until yesterday, I was all for God ending the world now. Do you know what happened next?
I remembered that it was my half-birthday.
My half-birthday is nothing special, if I'm being honest, but I think it's special because it's the birthday of an old friend of mine. Until last year, I wished her a happy birthday and she would wish me a happy half-birthday. On my birthday, I would wish her a happy half-birthday and she would wish me a happy birthday. Even though we weren't super close, it was our tradition and that tradition reminded me that there are bad things in the world but there are also good things in the world. I also felt like if I just gave up, I would be letting God and my family down, especially since I was as strong as I could be after Tym died.
I wish I knew what I'm supposed to be doing. I wish I knew that things would be okay. I don't know anyone who likes being scared and uncertainty is a scary thing for me. I'm trying to build myself back up from Hell Week, but I think I'll be different this time. I'll have to be more compromising and non-resistant because there are things that need to be done right now and it'll just keep getting worse if I'm not flexible to it. I've been through situations like this many times. I know how this works and I know that I'm going to have to start fighting again. So, let's do this.
Showing posts with label Money. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Money. Show all posts
September 20, 2015
January 6, 2015
Page 6: In Which Natasha Talks About Her Spending Freeze
Life in my corner of the world has been very nice as of late. I feel like I've gotten back into the groove at work and a lot more solid than I had in a while.
I have a problem, though. I was supposed to have been on a pseudo-spending freeze in December, but it just got worse. December was Christmas and I was determined to have the best Christmas ever, so I spent like a maniac on my family, friends and myself. On December 31st, my mother allowed me to have a little spending spree and Oh My Goodness, I went nuts. I spent more at Victoria's Secret in one day than I had in at least two years maybe. I also went back to Sephora, because I can now find a reason to go to the store or order online every time. Don't even get me started on Williams-Sonoma. Also, did you know that I can't leave Target without at least two of their high-end notebooks? Yeah, it was pretty bad. So much so, my credit card payments this month was astronomical (I'm too ashamed to actually give you the figure).
Since this is a problem, one that even my mother has noticed, I'm going on a spending freeze until mid-February starting tomorrow.
I've become to dependent on money in the past few months. I used it as a way of coping as well as a way to get rid of it because it's not good when you receive a check and burst into tears that are not full of joy. Going to Target is the only way I truly hang out with my sister. I am at the top of both Best Buy and Sephora's memberships, where you have to spend at least $1,000-$2,000. There was at least a solid block of over a month where my mother and I just ate take-out. The people at my nearby Wal-Mart know who I am. I'm not broke in the least bit, but I don't want to be broke before the middle of the year either. So, I need to do this spending freeze.
The plan is this: I am not buying anything that is not related to general living, school or work. That narrows my purchases down to the essentials (feminine products, towels, laundry, etc.), food, bills and transportation to both work and school. Everything else gets saved. This plan also helps me now because I'm back at work again and since it's Peak Season there, I'm doing mandatory overtime. Mandatory overtime equals bigger paychecks, which equals more money to save and more time to rest because I'm not hanging out at stores all the time.
I may start working on a journal that tracks my spending, but I'm pretty confident that I can hold through without recording it because I'm sticking to the basics.
Have you ever done a spending freeze? Did it work for you?
I have a problem, though. I was supposed to have been on a pseudo-spending freeze in December, but it just got worse. December was Christmas and I was determined to have the best Christmas ever, so I spent like a maniac on my family, friends and myself. On December 31st, my mother allowed me to have a little spending spree and Oh My Goodness, I went nuts. I spent more at Victoria's Secret in one day than I had in at least two years maybe. I also went back to Sephora, because I can now find a reason to go to the store or order online every time. Don't even get me started on Williams-Sonoma. Also, did you know that I can't leave Target without at least two of their high-end notebooks? Yeah, it was pretty bad. So much so, my credit card payments this month was astronomical (I'm too ashamed to actually give you the figure).
Since this is a problem, one that even my mother has noticed, I'm going on a spending freeze until mid-February starting tomorrow.
I've become to dependent on money in the past few months. I used it as a way of coping as well as a way to get rid of it because it's not good when you receive a check and burst into tears that are not full of joy. Going to Target is the only way I truly hang out with my sister. I am at the top of both Best Buy and Sephora's memberships, where you have to spend at least $1,000-$2,000. There was at least a solid block of over a month where my mother and I just ate take-out. The people at my nearby Wal-Mart know who I am. I'm not broke in the least bit, but I don't want to be broke before the middle of the year either. So, I need to do this spending freeze.
The plan is this: I am not buying anything that is not related to general living, school or work. That narrows my purchases down to the essentials (feminine products, towels, laundry, etc.), food, bills and transportation to both work and school. Everything else gets saved. This plan also helps me now because I'm back at work again and since it's Peak Season there, I'm doing mandatory overtime. Mandatory overtime equals bigger paychecks, which equals more money to save and more time to rest because I'm not hanging out at stores all the time.
I may start working on a journal that tracks my spending, but I'm pretty confident that I can hold through without recording it because I'm sticking to the basics.
Have you ever done a spending freeze? Did it work for you?
September 1, 2014
August Events and September Goals
August went by in a flash. I can't fathom that it's been more than a month since Tym's death and at the same time, I think that I'm healing.
If I could describe August with one word, it would be healing. I had set goals for myself but I didn't follow through on them because I really was trying to overlook the real problem and try to force myself into normality after such a tragic event. Every time I tried to act as if everything is okay, the effort was met with anger, heart-wrenching sobs and a pain in my chest like I have never known. So, something had to change.
Last month, I started seeing a psychotherapist to help with the grief as well as with my Generalized Anxiety Disorder, but mostly for the grief. I have quite an interesting one and he's very accommodating and understanding. He may be my favorite one yet. In addition to the psychotherapist, I got a new primary care physician and a new OB-GYN. Both of them, ironically, are men. I guess this is the year that I start being less subjective and see male doctors across the board.
My health came to the forefront of the month as my blood pressure skyrocketed. That's not a gross exaggeration, either. My blood pressure was 180/100. Then, it was 186/96. Then, it was 120/70. Then, it was 140/80. My primary care physician is going to follow up with me on it later this month. I hope it goes lower but I don't know if it will, to be honest.
I also dealt with a bout of insomnia. I would go to sleep and wake up only two hours later, then spend four hours up before going back to sleep for another three hours. That was hard as well. My primary care physician put me on something to help the problem, and it's working but it's also temporary. I can deal with that.
Because of the high blood pressure and the stress of forcing myself to act normal, I ended up taking the last two weeks of August off of work. It took me two weeks to come to terms with the fact that I was not doing well enough to work but I managed to bring in $20,000 worth of sales on the Saturday and Sunday before I went on break. I was really worried about what could happen if I took this break but at the last minute (or Friday, to be exact), my leave was officially approved by the company that handles the short term disability and FMLA claims for my job. So, most of the absences that I racked up in August won't be held against me. I'm so grateful about that.
Last but not least, August brought the life insurance policies. Tym named me beneficiary of the policy he had at his job and then his father started working towards a policy that Tym had for his motorcycle and in case there was an accident that left him severely injured or dead (which it did). For the policy that Tym's dad was working on, Tym's insurance company went after the insurance company that covered the person that killed Tym. I was notified about this information because I am Tym's wife. I got a letter in the mail on Saturday about a settlement from the other guy's insurance company but I came to a decision about that. Last Thursday, I got a letter in the mail from the insurance company that awarded me the life insurance from Tym's job. During a phone call to get an explanation about the letter, I found out that Tym took out a second policy and I was listed as the beneficiary on that one as well. So, life insurance. Yeah.
Now, we're in September and in the final months of 2014. This month will bring my 10 month work anniversary, so I'm excited about that. My biggest goals are to take each day at a time, to take care of myself and really establish a schedule when it comes to work. I've been off for a while, so I'm a bit nervous about going back starting tomorrow. Nevertheless, I'm excited as well. I still have a job to go to, which means that I get to be with my work family and earn my own money. That is something to be happy about.
Another goal that I have for this month is to get back into writing. I have this nifty writing/book review blog that I neglect so often and I also want to start on my second book. See, I think that one book just proves that you can write a book. A second book proves that you're capable of keeping the momentum. I want to keep the momentum.
What are your plans for September?
If I could describe August with one word, it would be healing. I had set goals for myself but I didn't follow through on them because I really was trying to overlook the real problem and try to force myself into normality after such a tragic event. Every time I tried to act as if everything is okay, the effort was met with anger, heart-wrenching sobs and a pain in my chest like I have never known. So, something had to change.
Last month, I started seeing a psychotherapist to help with the grief as well as with my Generalized Anxiety Disorder, but mostly for the grief. I have quite an interesting one and he's very accommodating and understanding. He may be my favorite one yet. In addition to the psychotherapist, I got a new primary care physician and a new OB-GYN. Both of them, ironically, are men. I guess this is the year that I start being less subjective and see male doctors across the board.
My health came to the forefront of the month as my blood pressure skyrocketed. That's not a gross exaggeration, either. My blood pressure was 180/100. Then, it was 186/96. Then, it was 120/70. Then, it was 140/80. My primary care physician is going to follow up with me on it later this month. I hope it goes lower but I don't know if it will, to be honest.
I also dealt with a bout of insomnia. I would go to sleep and wake up only two hours later, then spend four hours up before going back to sleep for another three hours. That was hard as well. My primary care physician put me on something to help the problem, and it's working but it's also temporary. I can deal with that.
Because of the high blood pressure and the stress of forcing myself to act normal, I ended up taking the last two weeks of August off of work. It took me two weeks to come to terms with the fact that I was not doing well enough to work but I managed to bring in $20,000 worth of sales on the Saturday and Sunday before I went on break. I was really worried about what could happen if I took this break but at the last minute (or Friday, to be exact), my leave was officially approved by the company that handles the short term disability and FMLA claims for my job. So, most of the absences that I racked up in August won't be held against me. I'm so grateful about that.
Last but not least, August brought the life insurance policies. Tym named me beneficiary of the policy he had at his job and then his father started working towards a policy that Tym had for his motorcycle and in case there was an accident that left him severely injured or dead (which it did). For the policy that Tym's dad was working on, Tym's insurance company went after the insurance company that covered the person that killed Tym. I was notified about this information because I am Tym's wife. I got a letter in the mail on Saturday about a settlement from the other guy's insurance company but I came to a decision about that. Last Thursday, I got a letter in the mail from the insurance company that awarded me the life insurance from Tym's job. During a phone call to get an explanation about the letter, I found out that Tym took out a second policy and I was listed as the beneficiary on that one as well. So, life insurance. Yeah.
Now, we're in September and in the final months of 2014. This month will bring my 10 month work anniversary, so I'm excited about that. My biggest goals are to take each day at a time, to take care of myself and really establish a schedule when it comes to work. I've been off for a while, so I'm a bit nervous about going back starting tomorrow. Nevertheless, I'm excited as well. I still have a job to go to, which means that I get to be with my work family and earn my own money. That is something to be happy about.
Another goal that I have for this month is to get back into writing. I have this nifty writing/book review blog that I neglect so often and I also want to start on my second book. See, I think that one book just proves that you can write a book. A second book proves that you're capable of keeping the momentum. I want to keep the momentum.
What are your plans for September?
July 30, 2013
...as i know it, week #39
School...as I know it: I have two distinct feelings about school right now: excitement and dread. I'm excited to go to school, of course. I feel like I've become stupid even being away from school as long as I have. I am so ready to take some classes, it's not even funny. I miss teachers and classmates and having a reason to go school shopping, even though I am getting closer to 30 with every breath I take. I miss school and I am so excited to go back. However, there is some dread. Most of the dread comes from the fact that I am going into school with very limited financial aid and no job. Having a job means that I could at least put some money away for additional classes but being unemployed means I'm going to have to take things on a case by case basis. Also, I have nearly 84 credits and I don't know how many of them will transfer in so I don't know where I am academically. I don't even know what major I really want to study. So, commence with the dread, but I'm hoping that the excitement will overpower it.
Health...as I know it: I'm getting back on track with my health and it feels really good. I'm going to finally (finally) meet my new psychiatrist on Friday afternoon and I made some calls to get into an orthopedic specialist about my hand. I see a podiatrist next week and I will have a new OB-GYN in September. I have to find out when my next dentist appointment is and I'm looking forward to that as well because my teeth being restored to the fairly well condition that they are in now has been such a joy. I got the majority of the work done last summer, and I don't know if the lot of you ever really knew that, and they've been holding up pretty well. I am also getting impatient with my hand. It's totally my fault, but it's now getting worse and it's already unsightly.
Money...as I know it: I think that my money woes of the earlier half of this year are finally subsiding. I'm going to commence with saving because I have a lot of things I need to do, but I'm going to enjoy not being broke a lot more than anything else. Also, I applied to seven jobs on Sunday night and I'm waiting to hear back on six of them. I'm getting to the point where I'm not too picky about where I work as long as I work in general, so that's a plus. I think that my financial breaking point was when I went shopping with my sister last weekend and I couldn't buy anything because I was so broke. I already have issues with spending money that doesn't belong to me, but I'm super grateful I have family that shares. I do see my siblings' financial positions as challenges for me to catch up with. I don't think I want to do better than them, but I don't want to be the one who has to depend on our mom all the time. I want to help out financially!
Life...as I know it: Here's the thing. I always underestimate myself but I am getting to a point where I can clearly see what I want to do with my time. I would like to travel again. I'm one of those people who needs a year or two to really want to jump on a plane and go somewhere. If all goes well with my intended major, I'll be required to study overseas for a semester, so I'm going to give myself a year or two to prepare for that as well. I do want to go somewhere soon and I'm thinking that California may be the place I go.
I'm also super excited about finishing my book, since I'm only four or so chapters away from completing my rough draft. It took me almost six years to finish and now that it's almost over, I'm almost stopping myself from just rushing through it and writing something I know will be absolute crap. I don't even know what I'll do with myself once this book is finished. I haven't even thought of what I would do once the book is finished. Maybe it's time for me to start making plans.
Health...as I know it: I'm getting back on track with my health and it feels really good. I'm going to finally (finally) meet my new psychiatrist on Friday afternoon and I made some calls to get into an orthopedic specialist about my hand. I see a podiatrist next week and I will have a new OB-GYN in September. I have to find out when my next dentist appointment is and I'm looking forward to that as well because my teeth being restored to the fairly well condition that they are in now has been such a joy. I got the majority of the work done last summer, and I don't know if the lot of you ever really knew that, and they've been holding up pretty well. I am also getting impatient with my hand. It's totally my fault, but it's now getting worse and it's already unsightly.
Money...as I know it: I think that my money woes of the earlier half of this year are finally subsiding. I'm going to commence with saving because I have a lot of things I need to do, but I'm going to enjoy not being broke a lot more than anything else. Also, I applied to seven jobs on Sunday night and I'm waiting to hear back on six of them. I'm getting to the point where I'm not too picky about where I work as long as I work in general, so that's a plus. I think that my financial breaking point was when I went shopping with my sister last weekend and I couldn't buy anything because I was so broke. I already have issues with spending money that doesn't belong to me, but I'm super grateful I have family that shares. I do see my siblings' financial positions as challenges for me to catch up with. I don't think I want to do better than them, but I don't want to be the one who has to depend on our mom all the time. I want to help out financially!
Life...as I know it: Here's the thing. I always underestimate myself but I am getting to a point where I can clearly see what I want to do with my time. I would like to travel again. I'm one of those people who needs a year or two to really want to jump on a plane and go somewhere. If all goes well with my intended major, I'll be required to study overseas for a semester, so I'm going to give myself a year or two to prepare for that as well. I do want to go somewhere soon and I'm thinking that California may be the place I go.
I'm also super excited about finishing my book, since I'm only four or so chapters away from completing my rough draft. It took me almost six years to finish and now that it's almost over, I'm almost stopping myself from just rushing through it and writing something I know will be absolute crap. I don't even know what I'll do with myself once this book is finished. I haven't even thought of what I would do once the book is finished. Maybe it's time for me to start making plans.
April 10, 2013
if anyone asks me about my first job, i will most likely never say that this was it.
What you're seeing here is a profile. The statistics are pretty clear cut (though not entirely entire) and the little 8 at the top of the page is just floating around, but they all mean something.
It means that my first job wasn't the door to door one or the awesome office job I had. It means that my first job was as a freelance writer.
I found a listing for freelance writers on a job board across from the computer lab where I went to in order to escape and get away. Never mind that I was living in a residence for women. I just knew that my father had died a little more six months before, my mother, sister and I had just got out of being homeless, I didn't have my high school diploma or GED and I wanted to make money. So. I signed up to become a writer with a company called Associated Content on January 10, 2007. My first article was about astrology determining your childhood. I got paid about $5 or $6.
From there, I kept writing. I had to find out how good I was and how much money I could make. Along the way, I wrote some very interesting articles about the art of the female body, television, online schooling and mental health. One of my articles that chronicled my perspective of the homeless situation my family and I found ourselves in made it to the front page. An article about toxic people was (and still is) the most popular article I've ever written. By the time I stopped writing for AC (which is now Yahoo! Voices), I had written 52 articles and retired almost 10 of them last year. Here is a list of most of my articles.
The ones that are retired are in red, but the majority of my articles are still active and online. You can also see the dates in which they were published were before my 22nd birthday. I never got paid much of anything and when I did, I used it for food or to buy CDs off of eBay. It was virtually pennies, though. Then, I started getting paid for performance, which is basically just royalties. Here are some pics of money I was paid per article.
As of today, in which I received $9.64, I've made $637.22 in about six years.
I was never ashamed of having this job. It got me a position as a staff writer at my school's newspaper. It showed me that I am good at journalism, enough in where I got paid for it. The only reason I stopped was because I started going to school and I got married and I got a real job that paid and had benefits. This took the back burner. I would eventually like to get back to it one day, but we'll see.
If you're interested in becoming a contributor at Yahoo Voices, please click here for more information.
It means that my first job wasn't the door to door one or the awesome office job I had. It means that my first job was as a freelance writer.
I found a listing for freelance writers on a job board across from the computer lab where I went to in order to escape and get away. Never mind that I was living in a residence for women. I just knew that my father had died a little more six months before, my mother, sister and I had just got out of being homeless, I didn't have my high school diploma or GED and I wanted to make money. So. I signed up to become a writer with a company called Associated Content on January 10, 2007. My first article was about astrology determining your childhood. I got paid about $5 or $6.
From there, I kept writing. I had to find out how good I was and how much money I could make. Along the way, I wrote some very interesting articles about the art of the female body, television, online schooling and mental health. One of my articles that chronicled my perspective of the homeless situation my family and I found ourselves in made it to the front page. An article about toxic people was (and still is) the most popular article I've ever written. By the time I stopped writing for AC (which is now Yahoo! Voices), I had written 52 articles and retired almost 10 of them last year. Here is a list of most of my articles.
The ones that are retired are in red, but the majority of my articles are still active and online. You can also see the dates in which they were published were before my 22nd birthday. I never got paid much of anything and when I did, I used it for food or to buy CDs off of eBay. It was virtually pennies, though. Then, I started getting paid for performance, which is basically just royalties. Here are some pics of money I was paid per article.
As of today, in which I received $9.64, I've made $637.22 in about six years.
I was never ashamed of having this job. It got me a position as a staff writer at my school's newspaper. It showed me that I am good at journalism, enough in where I got paid for it. The only reason I stopped was because I started going to school and I got married and I got a real job that paid and had benefits. This took the back burner. I would eventually like to get back to it one day, but we'll see.
If you're interested in becoming a contributor at Yahoo Voices, please click here for more information.
September 30, 2012
Page 273: Weekend, #2
In a complete contrast to last week, I was actually active this weekend and not just in the physical sense. My mind got a workout, as well as my body and my emotions.
My weekend officially started on Thursday, when I decided to take a mental health day. Instead of taking a complete mental health day, I did homework, ran errands and I bought a brand new computer (named Isla -- pronounced "eye-la"), four pairs of jeans that are pretty much perfect (bootcut, flare, skinny and ultra skinny) and only for the price of two. Along with some new Sims 3 expansion packs, about 6-8 new DVDs (including "The Avengers"), new books, a new hard drive, some songs from the new No Doubt and a new Blu-Ray player, that was pretty much it. I think that was the fastest Spend-A-Palooza I've ever gone through with the amount of money I had. Plus, I ended up saving about $200 from my original estimated list.
When I returned home, I watched the season premiere of "Grey's Anatomy" and "Scandal" while eating a thin crust pizza from Domino's. First and foremost, I really needed that pizza and secondly, "Grey's" is still on a roll!
On Friday, I went to get a new eye exam. Since I was buying eyeglasses online, I had to get a new eye exam as my prescription had expired in February. Instead of buying two pairs of glasses, I only bought one and intend to buy the other pair in November. My new glasses will be here in about a week or less, I believe. I think I spent the rest of the day chilling out.
Yesterday, I did more homework and worked on migrating my stuff onto Isla. That alone was a whole day affair. I also donated to two awesome charities. It wasn't a lot of money, but I was happy to give because it's almost just as good as volunteering (which I really loved doing before I started going to college). On top of that, I headed out to see the T before he headed off to Cleveland for his vacation. While brief, it was good to see him and spend the bit of time we did have together. After he got on his bus, I got on my own bus and went to grab some really good Mexican food from Qdoba. I had some Mexican gumbo and three tacos, and I got my mom a ground sirloin burrito with a whole-wheat tortilla. Again, still pretty chill but more active than just lying in bed and watching horror stuff.
Today, my brother woke me up. He needed to use my phone to recover his info from his old iPhone because he has an Android now and he really needed some pictures. We hung out with Wendy's in my room and shortly after he left, I had to restore my phone since he had put his stuff on it. Then, I went out to get some stuff from the store. My mom's officially sick, so I got my first cold/flu/fever care kit of the year.
My care kit is very much like a care package, with a box of Kleenex Cold Touch or Kleenex Anti-Viral tissues, soup of the patient's choice, Tropicana No Pulp Calcium and Vitamin D orange juice and cold medicine, preferably Theraflu Warming cold medicine that helps with cough, sore throat and nasal congestion. All I have to do is put all of this stuff in a box and add some movies that the patient really enjoys and it really will become a care package! If you couldn't tell, I really love care packages and I think by nature, I'm a nurturer.
The day's almost over, so I'm close this up. I will say that I plan to do lots of homework this week and maybe even begin to write again now that S-A-P is over and I can finally stop thinking about it.
How was your weekend?
My weekend officially started on Thursday, when I decided to take a mental health day. Instead of taking a complete mental health day, I did homework, ran errands and I bought a brand new computer (named Isla -- pronounced "eye-la"), four pairs of jeans that are pretty much perfect (bootcut, flare, skinny and ultra skinny) and only for the price of two. Along with some new Sims 3 expansion packs, about 6-8 new DVDs (including "The Avengers"), new books, a new hard drive, some songs from the new No Doubt and a new Blu-Ray player, that was pretty much it. I think that was the fastest Spend-A-Palooza I've ever gone through with the amount of money I had. Plus, I ended up saving about $200 from my original estimated list.
When I returned home, I watched the season premiere of "Grey's Anatomy" and "Scandal" while eating a thin crust pizza from Domino's. First and foremost, I really needed that pizza and secondly, "Grey's" is still on a roll!
On Friday, I went to get a new eye exam. Since I was buying eyeglasses online, I had to get a new eye exam as my prescription had expired in February. Instead of buying two pairs of glasses, I only bought one and intend to buy the other pair in November. My new glasses will be here in about a week or less, I believe. I think I spent the rest of the day chilling out.
Yesterday, I did more homework and worked on migrating my stuff onto Isla. That alone was a whole day affair. I also donated to two awesome charities. It wasn't a lot of money, but I was happy to give because it's almost just as good as volunteering (which I really loved doing before I started going to college). On top of that, I headed out to see the T before he headed off to Cleveland for his vacation. While brief, it was good to see him and spend the bit of time we did have together. After he got on his bus, I got on my own bus and went to grab some really good Mexican food from Qdoba. I had some Mexican gumbo and three tacos, and I got my mom a ground sirloin burrito with a whole-wheat tortilla. Again, still pretty chill but more active than just lying in bed and watching horror stuff.
Today, my brother woke me up. He needed to use my phone to recover his info from his old iPhone because he has an Android now and he really needed some pictures. We hung out with Wendy's in my room and shortly after he left, I had to restore my phone since he had put his stuff on it. Then, I went out to get some stuff from the store. My mom's officially sick, so I got my first cold/flu/fever care kit of the year.
My care kit is very much like a care package, with a box of Kleenex Cold Touch or Kleenex Anti-Viral tissues, soup of the patient's choice, Tropicana No Pulp Calcium and Vitamin D orange juice and cold medicine, preferably Theraflu Warming cold medicine that helps with cough, sore throat and nasal congestion. All I have to do is put all of this stuff in a box and add some movies that the patient really enjoys and it really will become a care package! If you couldn't tell, I really love care packages and I think by nature, I'm a nurturer.
The day's almost over, so I'm close this up. I will say that I plan to do lots of homework this week and maybe even begin to write again now that S-A-P is over and I can finally stop thinking about it.
How was your weekend?
August 29, 2012
Page 241: ...As I Know It, #1
The Future/School: Twitter always seems to provide a roundtable of mixed opinions, which leads to good opinions, not so good opinions and great opinions, which further leads to research and making a better decision for yourself and your life. So, I took my future plans to Twitter almost as soon as I made the decision. For those of you who didn't see it, I planned on getting my Bachelor's Degree in Education with a minor/concentration/additional licensing in Computer Science and then going for my MFA in English/Creative Writing. Then, I was going to return to school for my PhD in Education.
My original minor was going to be in a foreign language (French or Spanish) until I realized how Computer Science could lead to a job outside of Education. One friend gave me some encouraging info on how computer science was boring for him but he hoped that I didn't get bored. Another friend sent me the link to an article on the MFA in Creative Writing programs and another friend told me that I didn't need a PhD to teach at a collegiate level.
All of this advice was encouraging and exactly what I needed, confidence-wise. However, I did have some doubts and wondered why I had decided this path in my life. I figured it out, though.
The MFA in English/Creative Writing is not so much for my own benefit, although I will say that I did choose to study this for personal enrichment and to learn how to craft my writing. Still, I always have this lingering thought that while it'll be great for me to write the next great novel, I want to teach someone to write the next great novel. I want to spread my knowledge. So, maybe the MFA would be for my benefit and someone else's as well.
When I found out that I didn't need a PhD to teach at the collegiate level, I automatically made my PhD plans optional. It would be great if I don't need to spend another three years studying, but I think (read: hope) that a PhD would broaden my horizons and help me enhance my teaching skills. The plans are still optional, but I won't know until I get there.
On another related note, I applied to an online writers workshop school and submitted two unedited pieces that hadn't been read by anyone other than me last week. Based on the second piece I submitted, I got in and can enroll in a novel writing workshop whenever I want as long as I have the $750 to pay for the class and even then, I can apply for a scholarship.
Money: I've made it a mission in my life to create a "fuck you" bank account. For most people, this account would be the one where all your 3-6 months of saved money would be and it would be the same for me as well, but Pink made this sound so much better.
Basically, she has more than half of her money in a bank account in case someone tells her to do something she doesn't agree with. That being said, she can tell the person "fuck you" and she'll have money to keep herself and her family afloat. Granted, she makes millions, but I still don't see why I can't have one of these accounts. I should've had one of these accounts set up when I quit my first work study job two years ago, and I wouldn't have been crying in the bathtub during a romantic staycation with T.
So, I'm going to do it. I'm going to create a "fuck you" bank account at the end of September. I won't have any debit cards for it and I'm going to make transferring money out of it really hard. Otherwise, I'm going to have to learn some discipline, which is overdue.
Speaking of discipline, I found this antique (read: heavy) wooden desk at Goodwill today for $4.99. Can you believe that desk was $4.99?! I would've probably bought it if I had someone to carry it home and set it up. I guess that means that my old desk, which is going to be two in September, is not suiting me anymore.
Right Now/School: My math class begins tomorrow and all of the relaxation I thought I was getting is flying out the window. In one side of my head, I have the perky cheerleader, who is jumping up and down and ready to get the school party started. In the other side of my head, I have a petrified scaredy cat who's literally huddled in a corner and chewing her nails. I think I'm ready, but I won't really know until I get to that first class and get everything going. I mean, I've got a pretty good handle on my classes right now, but who knows what's going to happen later? I hope nothing stressful happens later.
Style/My Body: Although my school presence will be greatly reduced, I want some new clothes. I'd been thinking about bringing up my style level since about mid-month and was just going to get some new jeans, some pants, a shirt or two and a new coat, but then I saw some of the new clothes for Victoria's Secret and began to find ways to put some of the pieces into my fall wardrobe.
That being said, I miss my lanky body. I love being cute and curvy, but I feel like my extra weight is putting a strain on my body and on top of that, I miss feeling awkward because my limbs are long and lanky. I used to be a lanky person and I still am, which is probably why I don't look like the actual weight I am. So, I want to lose weight, about 10-40 pounds. It won't happen overnight and I'm okay with that, but I'm ready.
My original minor was going to be in a foreign language (French or Spanish) until I realized how Computer Science could lead to a job outside of Education. One friend gave me some encouraging info on how computer science was boring for him but he hoped that I didn't get bored. Another friend sent me the link to an article on the MFA in Creative Writing programs and another friend told me that I didn't need a PhD to teach at a collegiate level.
All of this advice was encouraging and exactly what I needed, confidence-wise. However, I did have some doubts and wondered why I had decided this path in my life. I figured it out, though.
The MFA in English/Creative Writing is not so much for my own benefit, although I will say that I did choose to study this for personal enrichment and to learn how to craft my writing. Still, I always have this lingering thought that while it'll be great for me to write the next great novel, I want to teach someone to write the next great novel. I want to spread my knowledge. So, maybe the MFA would be for my benefit and someone else's as well.
When I found out that I didn't need a PhD to teach at the collegiate level, I automatically made my PhD plans optional. It would be great if I don't need to spend another three years studying, but I think (read: hope) that a PhD would broaden my horizons and help me enhance my teaching skills. The plans are still optional, but I won't know until I get there.
On another related note, I applied to an online writers workshop school and submitted two unedited pieces that hadn't been read by anyone other than me last week. Based on the second piece I submitted, I got in and can enroll in a novel writing workshop whenever I want as long as I have the $750 to pay for the class and even then, I can apply for a scholarship.
Money: I've made it a mission in my life to create a "fuck you" bank account. For most people, this account would be the one where all your 3-6 months of saved money would be and it would be the same for me as well, but Pink made this sound so much better.
Basically, she has more than half of her money in a bank account in case someone tells her to do something she doesn't agree with. That being said, she can tell the person "fuck you" and she'll have money to keep herself and her family afloat. Granted, she makes millions, but I still don't see why I can't have one of these accounts. I should've had one of these accounts set up when I quit my first work study job two years ago, and I wouldn't have been crying in the bathtub during a romantic staycation with T.
So, I'm going to do it. I'm going to create a "fuck you" bank account at the end of September. I won't have any debit cards for it and I'm going to make transferring money out of it really hard. Otherwise, I'm going to have to learn some discipline, which is overdue.
Speaking of discipline, I found this antique (read: heavy) wooden desk at Goodwill today for $4.99. Can you believe that desk was $4.99?! I would've probably bought it if I had someone to carry it home and set it up. I guess that means that my old desk, which is going to be two in September, is not suiting me anymore.
Right Now/School: My math class begins tomorrow and all of the relaxation I thought I was getting is flying out the window. In one side of my head, I have the perky cheerleader, who is jumping up and down and ready to get the school party started. In the other side of my head, I have a petrified scaredy cat who's literally huddled in a corner and chewing her nails. I think I'm ready, but I won't really know until I get to that first class and get everything going. I mean, I've got a pretty good handle on my classes right now, but who knows what's going to happen later? I hope nothing stressful happens later.
Style/My Body: Although my school presence will be greatly reduced, I want some new clothes. I'd been thinking about bringing up my style level since about mid-month and was just going to get some new jeans, some pants, a shirt or two and a new coat, but then I saw some of the new clothes for Victoria's Secret and began to find ways to put some of the pieces into my fall wardrobe.
That being said, I miss my lanky body. I love being cute and curvy, but I feel like my extra weight is putting a strain on my body and on top of that, I miss feeling awkward because my limbs are long and lanky. I used to be a lanky person and I still am, which is probably why I don't look like the actual weight I am. So, I want to lose weight, about 10-40 pounds. It won't happen overnight and I'm okay with that, but I'm ready.
March 10, 2012
Page 71: It Always Starts With Something
Have you ever had the feeling that you're being shoved into your life? I think I'm having that issue.
I've reiterated time and again that I do not like to make goals because I don't really know how to truly follow through on it until I'm in the middle of it. However, I feel like I am being nudged into finally doing it, declaring it and following it through until the end.
This story starts with a car.
I had a busy week and I don't think my legs are going to recover any time soon. I usually catch the bus on time and if I'm lucky, I may have to dodge cars to get to the bus before it pulls off. More often than not this week, I found myself saying that I needed to learn how to drive. Then, I decided to take it one step further and I declared that not only would I learn how to drive, but I would also buy a used car by the end of the year.
My financial prospects ebb and flow, and has been that way for at least a year to a year and a half. My hours at my work study position are decreasing and my free time has been as well. I need a job, and there's really no other way around that. My financial aid refunds are nice, but there is no chance in hell I am going to be able to maintain my expenses if I buy said car. It's just not feasible in my head. No. I need a steady stream of income that I am earning. I'm not planning on quitting my work study job but this summer, I think it's time to find some solid employment.
I still have some more things I need to think out, but I don't want to procrastinate until I am (quite literally) shoved into the wild. So, this weekend will be dedicated to school: homework, future plans and a possible announcement. Until then, good night.
I've reiterated time and again that I do not like to make goals because I don't really know how to truly follow through on it until I'm in the middle of it. However, I feel like I am being nudged into finally doing it, declaring it and following it through until the end.
This story starts with a car.
I had a busy week and I don't think my legs are going to recover any time soon. I usually catch the bus on time and if I'm lucky, I may have to dodge cars to get to the bus before it pulls off. More often than not this week, I found myself saying that I needed to learn how to drive. Then, I decided to take it one step further and I declared that not only would I learn how to drive, but I would also buy a used car by the end of the year.
My financial prospects ebb and flow, and has been that way for at least a year to a year and a half. My hours at my work study position are decreasing and my free time has been as well. I need a job, and there's really no other way around that. My financial aid refunds are nice, but there is no chance in hell I am going to be able to maintain my expenses if I buy said car. It's just not feasible in my head. No. I need a steady stream of income that I am earning. I'm not planning on quitting my work study job but this summer, I think it's time to find some solid employment.
I still have some more things I need to think out, but I don't want to procrastinate until I am (quite literally) shoved into the wild. So, this weekend will be dedicated to school: homework, future plans and a possible announcement. Until then, good night.
February 10, 2012
Page 41: Favors, Reminders and Other Ramblings
I finally got something I've been longing for in the past week or so.
I slept.
I'd been getting up at freakishly early hours of the morning and hadn't been able to go back to sleep with the exception of an hour to two hour long nap later in the day, which would pose an issue because I couldn't sleep at night.
Last night, I had a hard time getting to sleep but I finally did.
Today, I took at least four different naps and I didn't really wake up until after 7 when I had to take something for the screaming leg pain from last night's gym class (which still has me beaming).
It was a very chill day today since it snowed (stupid me thought it was only in Illinois). I only left the house to get the mail and again, kept taking naps. Tomorrow will be saved for homework and probably more sleep. Mostly, though, I'm excited about Thursday.
Again, I have a little break from gym because it's the semi-annual Spend-a-Palooza and this one is proving to be interesting. So far, I've decided that I am getting an iPad (I need it for school) but I think I'm more excited about a very kooky, very unlike me purchase I'm making.
I'm buying roller skates.
I know that sounds very lame, but I haven't been in roller skates since I was 15 and my gym teacher, Mr. Henscik (sp?), let us have a roller skating party in the gym. I am so excited about these roller skates, you have no idea.
I need to catch up on a lot of things, like mail. I have some really awesome love letter requests from Hannah and the More Love Letters team. My love is going international! I need to work on homework (duh) and I need to send some cards out because I owe Kayte some of my business cards (she sent me some of hers and they were so adorbs).
On a sad note, my bulletin board fell again and my cake plate from Olivia is totally ruined. I think I may need to buy another one. On that note, I really shouldn't have put that bulletin board up again.
I want to let you guys know that the wonderful people (including me) at More Love Letters need your help. We (the royal "we") need donations to help with postage, and I'm certainly chipping in because Hannah is an angel, the other writers I work with are amazing and I would really like to have more international love letters. So, help some people out and chip in what you can. It would be super appreciated and while you're at it, write a love letter to someone who needs it. For instance, Katie (a super bright and hard working chick) really needs some love.
Heather (the blogger who was the first one to announce that More Love Letters needed writers) is part of a collaborative vlog channel on YouTube with Katie, and I know Katie from Twitter and blogging. Heather was the one who's really been trying to channel a lot of love and energy for Katie (who helps drop "love bombs" to other people in need). So, I'm really following Heather's footsteps in this, as well as the help that we both need with More Love Letters, but the more love given the better.
In other news, I am sponsoring a blog called Across The Pond and Megan, the owner of that blog, showcased me and some other sponsors today. I really love Across the Pond because it chronicles her life in Europe while she attended grad school for Neuroscience (I hope I got that right, but OMFG, she is br-izz-illiant!) after leaving the fashion industry in LA. She's witty and smart and her boyfriend has the best. accent. ever! So, please do me another favor (I'm all about asking for the favors today) and visit her blog.
Okay, enough favors for tonight. If you got this far, thank you. I'll see you all tomorrow.
I slept.
I'd been getting up at freakishly early hours of the morning and hadn't been able to go back to sleep with the exception of an hour to two hour long nap later in the day, which would pose an issue because I couldn't sleep at night.
Last night, I had a hard time getting to sleep but I finally did.
Today, I took at least four different naps and I didn't really wake up until after 7 when I had to take something for the screaming leg pain from last night's gym class (which still has me beaming).
It was a very chill day today since it snowed (stupid me thought it was only in Illinois). I only left the house to get the mail and again, kept taking naps. Tomorrow will be saved for homework and probably more sleep. Mostly, though, I'm excited about Thursday.
Again, I have a little break from gym because it's the semi-annual Spend-a-Palooza and this one is proving to be interesting. So far, I've decided that I am getting an iPad (I need it for school) but I think I'm more excited about a very kooky, very unlike me purchase I'm making.
I'm buying roller skates.
I know that sounds very lame, but I haven't been in roller skates since I was 15 and my gym teacher, Mr. Henscik (sp?), let us have a roller skating party in the gym. I am so excited about these roller skates, you have no idea.
I need to catch up on a lot of things, like mail. I have some really awesome love letter requests from Hannah and the More Love Letters team. My love is going international! I need to work on homework (duh) and I need to send some cards out because I owe Kayte some of my business cards (she sent me some of hers and they were so adorbs).
On a sad note, my bulletin board fell again and my cake plate from Olivia is totally ruined. I think I may need to buy another one. On that note, I really shouldn't have put that bulletin board up again.
I want to let you guys know that the wonderful people (including me) at More Love Letters need your help. We (the royal "we") need donations to help with postage, and I'm certainly chipping in because Hannah is an angel, the other writers I work with are amazing and I would really like to have more international love letters. So, help some people out and chip in what you can. It would be super appreciated and while you're at it, write a love letter to someone who needs it. For instance, Katie (a super bright and hard working chick) really needs some love.
Heather (the blogger who was the first one to announce that More Love Letters needed writers) is part of a collaborative vlog channel on YouTube with Katie, and I know Katie from Twitter and blogging. Heather was the one who's really been trying to channel a lot of love and energy for Katie (who helps drop "love bombs" to other people in need). So, I'm really following Heather's footsteps in this, as well as the help that we both need with More Love Letters, but the more love given the better.
In other news, I am sponsoring a blog called Across The Pond and Megan, the owner of that blog, showcased me and some other sponsors today. I really love Across the Pond because it chronicles her life in Europe while she attended grad school for Neuroscience (I hope I got that right, but OMFG, she is br-izz-illiant!) after leaving the fashion industry in LA. She's witty and smart and her boyfriend has the best. accent. ever! So, please do me another favor (I'm all about asking for the favors today) and visit her blog.
Okay, enough favors for tonight. If you got this far, thank you. I'll see you all tomorrow.
January 10, 2012
Page 10: Things to Hope For
Today, I bought sparkling grape juice for no reason other than it being fizzy, negotiated on a new air mattress because the one I needed wasn't in stock and the one I wanted was cheaper, put together said air mattress to make it sleepable, made some of my famous spaghetti, watched the majority of a somewhat funny movie I'm sure Chris Evans will not die in and took a brief nap. There was some in between feelings of general ickiness but my spaghetti can fix almost anything. Almost.
I feel better than I have lately, though I still have about six more days of my medicine regimen to go before I should see some better results, but I'm optimistic. I am hopeful.
I think I can do 2012.
Along with continuing to write for The World Needs More Love Letters, I also joined the writing team for HUGStronger, a brand spankin' new organization that supports college undergrads. The "HUG" part of HUGStronger actually stands for Helping Undergrads Grow, and I'm really glad to be a part of it because maybe I can give some advice to someone who's going through a little bit of what I was going through when I first returned to MATC and then when I first ended up on academic probation. I had my mother but there really wasn't anyone else to help me get everything together once I moved out. I was the only one out of my siblings that decided to stick through a community college and I was the only one out of my siblings that ended up in and got myself out of academic probation. I'm also the only one out of my siblings who is working a solely work-study position. So, I think that my experience with these things would be helpful.
Last night, I watched this video from the creator of HUGStronger, Kaleigh Sommers, and even though she looks so much like a baby to me, I felt for her and I knew that I wanted to be working with her.
If you add these two internet writing ventures to my writing for Associated Content (now called Yahoo Voices) and the MATC Times as well as being a member (and future writer) of the Phoenix Literary and Arts Magazine for my school, that would mean that I actually have a writing career, just not from fiction. Was that initially my goal? No. Is it something I'm conscious of now and am purposely choosing? Yes. I don't make any money from the majority of these projects and when I do make money (from Associated Content), it's from articles I wrote starting five years ago today, I haven't written any lately and it's not enough to be self sustaining (it's been five years and I've only made $585.67).
Let's talk about money, shall we? I'm in a good place financially, but I don't need a lot of money because I live at home. That being said, I'm set to receive my taxes in about 10 days and my financial aid refund in little more than a month. I know there's going to have to be some kind of saving and money used for important items, but I feel like I'm going to end up with more money than I'm going to spend because I'm still in the middle of shopping fatigue and I already have a great deal of the things I wanted. I hope to get to Seattle and to South Carolina this year but it may be slightly later than expected. My biggest issue is my brother's belated birthday present. He's turning 24 and I promised to get him a DSLR, but the one he wants is out of my range, so I'm trying to figure out what to do. However, I know that I can be a lot worse off and I'm glad that's my only financial issue as of right now.
In conclusion, I'm happy that I'm getting better. I don't know if I've gotten past the hill of rough things, but I'm getting better. That's good enough for me.
I feel better than I have lately, though I still have about six more days of my medicine regimen to go before I should see some better results, but I'm optimistic. I am hopeful.
I think I can do 2012.
Along with continuing to write for The World Needs More Love Letters, I also joined the writing team for HUGStronger, a brand spankin' new organization that supports college undergrads. The "HUG" part of HUGStronger actually stands for Helping Undergrads Grow, and I'm really glad to be a part of it because maybe I can give some advice to someone who's going through a little bit of what I was going through when I first returned to MATC and then when I first ended up on academic probation. I had my mother but there really wasn't anyone else to help me get everything together once I moved out. I was the only one out of my siblings that decided to stick through a community college and I was the only one out of my siblings that ended up in and got myself out of academic probation. I'm also the only one out of my siblings who is working a solely work-study position. So, I think that my experience with these things would be helpful.
Last night, I watched this video from the creator of HUGStronger, Kaleigh Sommers, and even though she looks so much like a baby to me, I felt for her and I knew that I wanted to be working with her.
If you add these two internet writing ventures to my writing for Associated Content (now called Yahoo Voices) and the MATC Times as well as being a member (and future writer) of the Phoenix Literary and Arts Magazine for my school, that would mean that I actually have a writing career, just not from fiction. Was that initially my goal? No. Is it something I'm conscious of now and am purposely choosing? Yes. I don't make any money from the majority of these projects and when I do make money (from Associated Content), it's from articles I wrote starting five years ago today, I haven't written any lately and it's not enough to be self sustaining (it's been five years and I've only made $585.67).
Let's talk about money, shall we? I'm in a good place financially, but I don't need a lot of money because I live at home. That being said, I'm set to receive my taxes in about 10 days and my financial aid refund in little more than a month. I know there's going to have to be some kind of saving and money used for important items, but I feel like I'm going to end up with more money than I'm going to spend because I'm still in the middle of shopping fatigue and I already have a great deal of the things I wanted. I hope to get to Seattle and to South Carolina this year but it may be slightly later than expected. My biggest issue is my brother's belated birthday present. He's turning 24 and I promised to get him a DSLR, but the one he wants is out of my range, so I'm trying to figure out what to do. However, I know that I can be a lot worse off and I'm glad that's my only financial issue as of right now.
In conclusion, I'm happy that I'm getting better. I don't know if I've gotten past the hill of rough things, but I'm getting better. That's good enough for me.
January 4, 2012
Page 4: In Which I Make Some Decisions
I will not let this small health blip get in the way of my year.
It wants to, especially now that my doctor made me reschedule my Jan. 16th appointment to February because she wants me to get a second blood test to see if this was just a one time incident.
That's okay, though. If I get impatient, I'll get a second opinion. In the meantime, I have plans/goals and I won't let this small little health blip get in the way of them.
I've been touching base with Max from Gold's Gym via email, and I think he's a personal trainer.
My personal trainer, to be specific.
I'm not too sure, but he asked when I wanted to come in and if I could stop in for 15 minutes this week, and I got the feeling that this guy may be my new personal trainer.
I apparently forgot to mention that I may become a member even though I have gym class as well.
Now I've mentioned it.
Either way, I'm stopping in on Friday to check it out and I'm really excited. I'm also excited about some other things coming up.
I finished my taxes this morning. Now, I have to wait 8 more days to just file them. I get less money than I did last year, but I also made a lot less than I did because I was receiving unemployment and working part time (WI doesn't count work-study as an income/job, which allowed me to still get unemployment). I only made a little over $1,000 at work in 2011, which is a huge contrast from the $13,000 or so I made in 2010, but I'm happy because I'm still working and a working, busy me is a sane me.
Once I file my taxes and get them back, I will finally take the plunge and get a normal mattress and box spring for my room.
(Insert gasp here)
I'd been talking about one and talking about one for at least a year and a half now, since I've been literally sleeping on air mattresses since 2008, but I'm finally doing it. I think I never did it before because not only is going to buy one and bring it home really not in my book of fun things to do, I never felt any real sense of permanence. At first, I was just broke (2008/2009) and I moved to a new and smaller place with T in 2009 as well. 2010 is when I had a Britney and moved back in with my mom. I always thought that I would be moving again before I got a real bed, but I don't think I'll be leaving home until I finish school (which will be either next December or May, 2013, if the world doesn't end). I do realize that this does put off my marriage and any plans of babies for longer than expected, but none of this was really in my control when it first happened and I really need to finish school. The last 14 months have kept me really balanced and sane, so I don't want to fuck that up.
Now, onto that second (really small/minor) decision. I'll keep this short.
I'm getting a classic iPod (160GB) in February. I like Elisabeth (my iPod Touch) a lot but having an iPod touch and an iPhone feels a little like overkill. I think it's time to go back to the basics.
It wants to, especially now that my doctor made me reschedule my Jan. 16th appointment to February because she wants me to get a second blood test to see if this was just a one time incident.
That's okay, though. If I get impatient, I'll get a second opinion. In the meantime, I have plans/goals and I won't let this small little health blip get in the way of them.
I've been touching base with Max from Gold's Gym via email, and I think he's a personal trainer.
My personal trainer, to be specific.
I'm not too sure, but he asked when I wanted to come in and if I could stop in for 15 minutes this week, and I got the feeling that this guy may be my new personal trainer.
I apparently forgot to mention that I may become a member even though I have gym class as well.
Now I've mentioned it.
Either way, I'm stopping in on Friday to check it out and I'm really excited. I'm also excited about some other things coming up.
I finished my taxes this morning. Now, I have to wait 8 more days to just file them. I get less money than I did last year, but I also made a lot less than I did because I was receiving unemployment and working part time (WI doesn't count work-study as an income/job, which allowed me to still get unemployment). I only made a little over $1,000 at work in 2011, which is a huge contrast from the $13,000 or so I made in 2010, but I'm happy because I'm still working and a working, busy me is a sane me.
Once I file my taxes and get them back, I will finally take the plunge and get a normal mattress and box spring for my room.
(Insert gasp here)
I'd been talking about one and talking about one for at least a year and a half now, since I've been literally sleeping on air mattresses since 2008, but I'm finally doing it. I think I never did it before because not only is going to buy one and bring it home really not in my book of fun things to do, I never felt any real sense of permanence. At first, I was just broke (2008/2009) and I moved to a new and smaller place with T in 2009 as well. 2010 is when I had a Britney and moved back in with my mom. I always thought that I would be moving again before I got a real bed, but I don't think I'll be leaving home until I finish school (which will be either next December or May, 2013, if the world doesn't end). I do realize that this does put off my marriage and any plans of babies for longer than expected, but none of this was really in my control when it first happened and I really need to finish school. The last 14 months have kept me really balanced and sane, so I don't want to fuck that up.
Now, onto that second (really small/minor) decision. I'll keep this short.
I'm getting a classic iPod (160GB) in February. I like Elisabeth (my iPod Touch) a lot but having an iPod touch and an iPhone feels a little like overkill. I think it's time to go back to the basics.
December 31, 2011
2011: A Year In Review
On January 22, 2011, I posted this video:
This video was my declaration to finally step out of from behind a tree and connect with more people. I think I did this with a vengeance and it turned out well.
January
My mother and I rang in the new year dancing. I found myself undertaking a lot of stress. I'd just finished a very stressful yet successful Fall semester. I'd quit my job after literally spending time after work telling my boss off (in a very calm manner, might I add). I'd become a mother to another little male rat baby. I'd also come from a beautiful weekend with my husband, who I'd been on the verge of divorcing throughout that entire year. I was afraid of a lot of things in January because all of it was new and I was losing out on a lot of money. I was starting a new work study position and I was finally going to see a psychiatrist. I even joined the school newspaper, which had just happened earlier in the day from when that video was shot.
February
The whole psychiatrist thing went bust. I spent a good chunk of the month believing that I was crazy, all chock full of mood disorders, bipolar disorder and A.D.D. All of Wisconsin was buried in snow and I fully took the time to savor Whole Foods for the first time. The last rat I'd had since he'd been born about a year before died and I was suddenly a rat mommy to two new rats that were from the humane society. I also received a wonderful care package from Cait after joining Ashley's Valentine Blog Swap, as well as a jumbo Valentine's Day card from T. When I received my financial aid, I paid a lot of bills and got some new glasses. My first big newspaper assignment was to cover the Grand Ball luncheon, and it was wonderful.
March
I turned 26 and ushered the new year in with pizza, cake and video games. Earlier in the month, I was harassed with emails by a blogger accusing me of stealing her and her friends' pictures, threatening legal action. It prompted me to contact the computer crimes department of my city's police department and he sent the blogger an email for her and her friends to leave me alone after one of her friends called my school and spoke with the director of student life in an attempt to contact my job (it was obviously not my job, but still my school). I didn't hear from her again. March also sent me to the Grand Ball, where I dressed up and ate a wonderful (yet sickening) dinner with T and did my best reporting duties.
April
April was a slow month. Not much happened and that was a good thing. School was winding down and I did get a small refund from a class that was closed before it began. I had a lackluster Spring Break and I also saw another psychiatrist, who probably needed one of her own. That didn't last. The end of this month was on a happy note when I watched Prince William and Kate Middleton get married late at night on television, along with Stevie (which prompted some awesome tweeting).
May
Another slow month. I don't remember much happening here except the end of my semesters and going to a dinner for the Times, where I got my first award. I also interviewed a group of Culinary Arts students and their teacher after they won a competition. That was fun.
June
I began a summer semester in school, and that summer semester turned out to be hellish. I hated my Sociology class and my boss was hardly ever at the school when I was working, so that led to not that many hours. I also started going through a weird time with my body as I'd begun tracking everything I ate and walking in the oppressive heat. My sister finally bought a car and I sprained my shoulder, which led to weird twitches in my pinky. My old doctor thought I was having seizures. She was wrong. I started going on Sister Dates with my sister, one of which led to my sister driving in a severe thunderstorm and almost skidding out...twice. I also had my "Mon Vie" blog designed when my good friend named Rachel did it for me for free. Yet, I started to feel numb and didn't communicate much. At the end of this month, I met my new doctor, who I love, and received another financial aid refund, which turned out pretty fun.
July
I hit the halfway mark of the summer semester and immersed myself in books. However, the heat was appalling and I didn't do much but walk and continue to play with my camera Cab after taking pictures the previous month. I did, however, end up getting a surprise visit from T and we spent the day taking pictures and making videos. There were also a couple of weddings going on that day, but it was a beautiful day and it was my final day of classes.
August
I started out the month finishing my Summer semester and finished it by starting my Fall semester. This was the month where I thought I had my past figured out and I was wrong. I also went to an Apple Hiring Event that month, and found some odd respect for the company. I had to leave class early to do it and I didn't get the job, but it was a good experience. I also changed my blog name for the last time and moved it to blogger under the name "Small and Charming."
September
The rest of my classes began this month and so did my return to the Times. I was approached early on to go to a conference, so that made the semester feel sweet. My 3rd anniversary to my husband arrived. I began a series of lengthy articles and also sprained my right wrist. I also met Erini at a Mucca Pazza concert, which was the first concert I'd ever been to. We had so much fun and I spent most of the time filming and chatting her up. During this month, I also got a financial aid refund that got me a new computer, a Kindle, shoes with colorful laces, perfume, a purse and began my Kindle book addiction. I also started vlogging. Though it wasn't much, I did an outdoor vlog and I thought it went well. I also read the best books of the year and started writing Love Letters.
October
That month, I was all over the place. During some moments, I was strong and I could see the future. During other times, I was drowning. Drowning, drowning, drowning. My father in law ended up having a blockage in his neck and his ordeal had me slightly stressed and worried for his family. Still, I managed to finish my Intro to Foodservice/Hospitality Industry class with an A. Two weeks later, I was on my first plane to Orlando, Florida, where I spent four days having the time of my life and that was much better than the previous October.
November
I returned to school and my life out of sorts. I had a crush on someone completely unattainable. I quit the Times after my editor decided to be immature about not being able to get on our correct flight. I helped to host and participate in an Open Mic Event. I wore purple tights, which I do not regret. I didn't even react when my best friend broke up with me because by the time she did it, our relationship was beyond repair. I also ventured in vlogging again. I did vlogs from Orlando, so I thought it would be nice to start doing it in Milwaukee. It lasted 10 days. I started listening to the radio at night. My health also started to decline, as I ended up with a viral infection. Being featured on the More Love Letters Blog more than made up for that, though. This month would provide me with the biggest surprise yet when my mother became the recipient of over $10,000 and my siblings and I all ended up with $1,500 to spend with, no strings attached. Combined with the previous times I'd received financial aid and tax refunds this year, I'd done more shopping than I'd ever done. I even shopped on Black Friday and Cyber Monday.
December
December was very much like the end of November when it came to money (as in shopping my ass off). Still, so many things happened. I launched a Christmas campaign for the blog which gave me some really wonderful guest posts. I spent more time in a post office than I ever did before. I gave some meaningful yet awesome gifts. I spent a lot of time at Whole Foods and Subway. I started reading the Bible. I participated in the biggest Love Letter campaign ever. I got two copies of a book I'd been waiting a year to read. I embraced being a writer. I indulged myself with orange floats and cheese fries. I met, and ate, the best grilled cheese sandwich ever. I received my very first business cards and a life planner. I also received so many Christmas cards from friends on Twitter and in person and I received wonderful gifts from my in-laws, my future sister in law, my sister and my mom, but my health continued its dreadful decline. The viral infection I had in November left me unable to finish my antibiotics, and the right side of my face blew up two sizes bigger than it should've been. A tooth had to be yanked out (and that's exactly what happened after I could still feel the pain of it being pulled despite having 8-10 injections of Novocain), but I still went to work later that day. In the end, I had the most laid back Christmas ever, complete with movies and pizza.
So, what did you think? Did I branch out? What's next? I'm hoping that 2012 will provide me with more self control and a bit more fun with the people I love while not doing so many social things. I also want to keep my communication lines open with my good friends and hopefully meet more of them this upcoming year. That being said, I have approximately 12 hours before it's time to say goodbye to 2011. This year has been a great one.
December 3, 2011
How to Give The Perfect Present
ChristmasPalooza continues as I attempt to give some advice on how to give the perfect gift.
We've all been there, complete gift disasters. Chances are that you've given someone at least one crappy gift that they've returned or re-gifted to some poor unsuspecting sucker or you're the poor sucker who ended up with the crappy gift. Either way, crappy gifts are just no good.
Black Friday and Cyber Monday were implemented for us consumers to find the "perfect" gift at an affordable price, but I strongly believe that those two days cause more harm than good because every store play the "supply and demand" game a bit too well and it's gotten to the point that people are getting injured or killed for some toy or shoes. No, that's no good. Besides, we're almost sinking into an economic depression in the midst of war and poverty. The last thing we need is to kill each other for a Tickle Me Elmo (see? I just aged myself, didn't I?)
Here's some very easy, very self-explanatory gift giving tips that should help you (or someone close to you) find the perfect gift with minimal complications and (hopefully) minimal money.
- Listen (also known as "Know Your Audience"): I learned this tip best with my mother. I live with her, so it's very easy to pick up on things she may like or need but would never get for herself because she may forget. Thankfully, I have the memory of an elephant.
If a person mentions something more than once, it is important to them so pay attention. Assess this throughout the year and when the time comes to finally get that person a gift, you will have a better idea of what to get them. You may also want to pay attention to what they have and what they don't. Since my family is small and we all live very close to one another, it's very easy for me to see what they have, what they don't, what they want and if they get it for themselves or not.
- Steer Clear of Trends: Again, this is more catered to those who shop on Black Friday or Cyber Monday, but any shopper can apply this to their shopping M.O.
If you look for gifts that aren't really trendy, you'll have a better chance of getting your hands on it at a really good deal. Most of the time, I get really lucky during store-wide sales because I'm not looking for something that's part of the current trend (with the exception of my iPhone, and I learned my lesson because they didn't have any white ones). If you're not one for online shopping, like me, this tip comes in handy because stores only have a certain amount of items so you may have to improvise or go another way.
- Research: This is probably a well known tip for shoppers and there is good reason why. Before I even get large amounts of money in my hand, I spend a lot of time (weeks) researching things I may be interested in. I may change my mind during that time and while I've learned that my mind won't be completely made up until I'm actually in the stores; scouring websites for the best prices, customer reviews and availability helps me a great deal. I research weekly sales and I go to stores that will match competitor's prices. Best Buy is really great with this because they may have lower prices online than in store. If you do your research and find that it is cheaper online than in store, they will match that price. Best Buy also gives you back the difference if something you've bought goes on sale the next week. I've probably saved/gotten back a little more than $200 that way.
- When In Doubt, Use The Internet: I really don't enjoy online shopping because my current residence doesn't have a doorbell but has security doors, which makes package delivery very difficult unless I take time out of my schedule to wait or the package is going through the Postal Service. Still, there are times when I have no choice. For example, my sister and I found some shoes that she really wanted at Sears. However, they didn't have the shoes in her size so she didn't buy them. Using tip #1, I went to the Sears website and looked for those shoes. Not only did they have them in her size but they were also $20 cheaper than the in-store price. I also did the same thing for my mother. She really like TV show boxed sets, so I found one of her favorite shows, How I Met Your Mother, for $13.49 each on Amazon in contrast to the nearly $20-$30 they were going for in stores. I ended up buying two seasons and spending what I would've probably spent on one season, plus I got free shipping.
- Use What You're Given: One thing I learned about spending money is that some stores love to give you money back. It's almost symbiotic, to be honest. Best Buy (they're really not endorsing this post), Sephora and Victoria's Secret are good at this. I normally shop at Best Buy in September or October and if you're a member of their Reward Zone program, you get points back with almost every dollar you spend. After a month or so, you end up with a nifty gift certificate. Sometimes, they email you gift certificates just because. Victoria's Secret sometimes send coupons for free panties or buy one, get one free deals. Sephora has sent me $15 gift certificates for shopping with them.
If you're a member of these stores' rewards programs and you are given rewards, use those towards your gifts. Two years ago, I received a $20 gift certificate from Best Buy and used it to buy my mother's Christmas presents. With a budget of $50, I only spent $12 after using that gift certificate. Anything that helps you save money and allows you to give your loved ones some kick-ass gifts is very helpful.
- Beware of Impatient People: This can be any gift giver's downfall, the impatient person. I'm rather impatient, but this could end up being a disaster. Sometimes, the gift giver is the impatient person and is rather proud of their gifts so they make the recipient of the gift open it before Christmas. Yes, I may have done that with all of the gifts I've given my sister.
The problem is patience is a virtue and if one is not patient, they do not deserve the gift. The best way to combat being overexcited is to think of the gift as yours and ask yourself if you would want someone to ruin your surprise before Christmas. To combat an impatient, overexcited person, get the gift wrapped ahead of time, learn how to utilize silence and how to withstand interrogations. An impatient person (you included) can ruin a holiday by spilling the beans ahead of time, so silence is golden.
- It's Okay to Be Self Conscious: On this topic, I learned two things. One was topic #1 and the second one was that a gift is something you want that person to have. If you think that the person may like it, it is rude for them to ask for a gift receipt to return it. This also reinforces the fact that people drop hints about things they want and it is up to you to see if they already have it by the time you're ready to go Christmas shopping. If all else fails, get a gift card. That way, the person can always get what they want.
However, it's alright to worry that you may not have gotten the perfect present for your mom, dad, sibling, or significant other (because those are the only people that matter anyway). Being self-conscious about your gift buying choices always makes you shine on the inside when the person turns out to really enjoy it.
Last but not least...
- Enjoy your holidays: Gifts are awesome and all, but that is not the reason behind Christmas. Christmas, Kwanzaa, Hanukkah and every other holiday is really for people to spend time together and revel in their fellowship. Gifts are always optional and always a privilege, but not the end of Christmas if you don't get one or if you don't have one for another person. Remember that being in the company of the people you love is a gift enough.
We've all been there, complete gift disasters. Chances are that you've given someone at least one crappy gift that they've returned or re-gifted to some poor unsuspecting sucker or you're the poor sucker who ended up with the crappy gift. Either way, crappy gifts are just no good.
Black Friday and Cyber Monday were implemented for us consumers to find the "perfect" gift at an affordable price, but I strongly believe that those two days cause more harm than good because every store play the "supply and demand" game a bit too well and it's gotten to the point that people are getting injured or killed for some toy or shoes. No, that's no good. Besides, we're almost sinking into an economic depression in the midst of war and poverty. The last thing we need is to kill each other for a Tickle Me Elmo (see? I just aged myself, didn't I?)
Here's some very easy, very self-explanatory gift giving tips that should help you (or someone close to you) find the perfect gift with minimal complications and (hopefully) minimal money.
- Listen (also known as "Know Your Audience"): I learned this tip best with my mother. I live with her, so it's very easy to pick up on things she may like or need but would never get for herself because she may forget. Thankfully, I have the memory of an elephant.
If a person mentions something more than once, it is important to them so pay attention. Assess this throughout the year and when the time comes to finally get that person a gift, you will have a better idea of what to get them. You may also want to pay attention to what they have and what they don't. Since my family is small and we all live very close to one another, it's very easy for me to see what they have, what they don't, what they want and if they get it for themselves or not.
- Steer Clear of Trends: Again, this is more catered to those who shop on Black Friday or Cyber Monday, but any shopper can apply this to their shopping M.O.
If you look for gifts that aren't really trendy, you'll have a better chance of getting your hands on it at a really good deal. Most of the time, I get really lucky during store-wide sales because I'm not looking for something that's part of the current trend (with the exception of my iPhone, and I learned my lesson because they didn't have any white ones). If you're not one for online shopping, like me, this tip comes in handy because stores only have a certain amount of items so you may have to improvise or go another way.
- Research: This is probably a well known tip for shoppers and there is good reason why. Before I even get large amounts of money in my hand, I spend a lot of time (weeks) researching things I may be interested in. I may change my mind during that time and while I've learned that my mind won't be completely made up until I'm actually in the stores; scouring websites for the best prices, customer reviews and availability helps me a great deal. I research weekly sales and I go to stores that will match competitor's prices. Best Buy is really great with this because they may have lower prices online than in store. If you do your research and find that it is cheaper online than in store, they will match that price. Best Buy also gives you back the difference if something you've bought goes on sale the next week. I've probably saved/gotten back a little more than $200 that way.
- When In Doubt, Use The Internet: I really don't enjoy online shopping because my current residence doesn't have a doorbell but has security doors, which makes package delivery very difficult unless I take time out of my schedule to wait or the package is going through the Postal Service. Still, there are times when I have no choice. For example, my sister and I found some shoes that she really wanted at Sears. However, they didn't have the shoes in her size so she didn't buy them. Using tip #1, I went to the Sears website and looked for those shoes. Not only did they have them in her size but they were also $20 cheaper than the in-store price. I also did the same thing for my mother. She really like TV show boxed sets, so I found one of her favorite shows, How I Met Your Mother, for $13.49 each on Amazon in contrast to the nearly $20-$30 they were going for in stores. I ended up buying two seasons and spending what I would've probably spent on one season, plus I got free shipping.
- Use What You're Given: One thing I learned about spending money is that some stores love to give you money back. It's almost symbiotic, to be honest. Best Buy (they're really not endorsing this post), Sephora and Victoria's Secret are good at this. I normally shop at Best Buy in September or October and if you're a member of their Reward Zone program, you get points back with almost every dollar you spend. After a month or so, you end up with a nifty gift certificate. Sometimes, they email you gift certificates just because. Victoria's Secret sometimes send coupons for free panties or buy one, get one free deals. Sephora has sent me $15 gift certificates for shopping with them.
If you're a member of these stores' rewards programs and you are given rewards, use those towards your gifts. Two years ago, I received a $20 gift certificate from Best Buy and used it to buy my mother's Christmas presents. With a budget of $50, I only spent $12 after using that gift certificate. Anything that helps you save money and allows you to give your loved ones some kick-ass gifts is very helpful.
- Beware of Impatient People: This can be any gift giver's downfall, the impatient person. I'm rather impatient, but this could end up being a disaster. Sometimes, the gift giver is the impatient person and is rather proud of their gifts so they make the recipient of the gift open it before Christmas. Yes, I may have done that with all of the gifts I've given my sister.
The problem is patience is a virtue and if one is not patient, they do not deserve the gift. The best way to combat being overexcited is to think of the gift as yours and ask yourself if you would want someone to ruin your surprise before Christmas. To combat an impatient, overexcited person, get the gift wrapped ahead of time, learn how to utilize silence and how to withstand interrogations. An impatient person (you included) can ruin a holiday by spilling the beans ahead of time, so silence is golden.
- It's Okay to Be Self Conscious: On this topic, I learned two things. One was topic #1 and the second one was that a gift is something you want that person to have. If you think that the person may like it, it is rude for them to ask for a gift receipt to return it. This also reinforces the fact that people drop hints about things they want and it is up to you to see if they already have it by the time you're ready to go Christmas shopping. If all else fails, get a gift card. That way, the person can always get what they want.
However, it's alright to worry that you may not have gotten the perfect present for your mom, dad, sibling, or significant other (because those are the only people that matter anyway). Being self-conscious about your gift buying choices always makes you shine on the inside when the person turns out to really enjoy it.
Last but not least...
- Enjoy your holidays: Gifts are awesome and all, but that is not the reason behind Christmas. Christmas, Kwanzaa, Hanukkah and every other holiday is really for people to spend time together and revel in their fellowship. Gifts are always optional and always a privilege, but not the end of Christmas if you don't get one or if you don't have one for another person. Remember that being in the company of the people you love is a gift enough.
November 23, 2011
Spend-a-Palooza, Parte Deux
This year, I had a total of four "Spend-a-Palooza" events. In February, I paid bills and bought adult things like new eyeglasses and rain boots I eventually grew to hate. In July, I bought cute things like a purse, makeup and a watch. In September, I bought the big ticket items such as a new computer and a Kindle, as well as a plethora of books for it. This month, the unexpected one, brought a little bit of everything: bills, big ticket items and cute things. Instead of being all explain-y, I'd rather just show you all.
From left to right: Buffy, Season Nine comic #3, Rihanna's Talk that Talk (which was free after I signed up for my new phone plan), A notebook from Barnes and Noble, Coach Poppy/Poppy Flower Rollerball Duo from Sephora, Two Hello Kitty Shiny Gel Ink Pens, SanDisk 4GB SDHC memory card, Organic Lavender Hand Sanitizer Spray from Williams-Sonoma, Nick (my new iPhone 4s) with his plaid case.
Nick (again -- he really likes the spotlight), Cherry Cola syrup from Williams-Sonoma, Raspberry and Rose Cordial Syrup from Williams-Sonoma (I really like the drink syrups), Cards from Francesca's Collections. The one with the quote by D.M. Dellinger ("You are unrepeatable...") is the one originally on a pin board in my room, because I am mailing the one I just recently bought.
The syrups up front, as well as Nick (see?). I've already started on the Raspberry and Rose cordial syrup. You can add still water or seltzer to it to make either a juice or a soda. I've been using seltzer water and it tastes wonderful.
The little things, up close and without Nick. I don't personally buy full size perfumes. Instead, I collect rollerball perfume. This is the second one I bought this year that I adore, other than Ralph Lauren Romance (my signature scent). I also bought Clinique Happy, but that reminded me of my sister so I ended up giving it to her. The pens mean a lot to me because I get them from the same store my sister bought me my first Hello Kitty Gelly Roll Pen this past summer during one of our sister dates. Those aren't Gelly Roll pens, but I really liked them. The hand sanitizer was $3.00 and from my favorite store, so I bought it. It's a spray, so that comes in really handy.
These movies were totally unexpected. See, I was at Best Buy and I initially grabbed Tales from the Crypt because I really have been wanting to see it and two seasons were $19.99. Then, I called my mom to see if she wanted me to pick up a DVD boxed set. She left the decision up to me but when I went back to go get it, I ended up with Scream and Scream 4, The Femme Fatale tour, Captain America and Scott Pilgrim. Yesterday, I'd gone to Wal-Mart for a few things, namely some movies for my mom. Again, I ended up with The Covenant (Chace Crawford pre-Gossip Girl), Almost Famous - The Bootleg Version (which was $22 cheaper than I thought it was and my best investment thus far. The extended/extra scenes are legendary and make the movie that much better), The Shining and The Terminator (both of which are not pictured). With the exception of Almost Famous, all of the other movies were $5, so it wasn't a big hit to my wallet.
Girlie things. If I have the money for it, I never pass up a chance to get VS panties. The 5/$25 deal for the VS Pink ones is an addiction and I hardly get underwear from any other store. I also got a free pair of VS seamless panties from a card my M-I-L sent me when I was in Orlando. There's a couple of pairs that is actually from Aeropostale in the bunch. Everything in store was 50% off, so I grabbed a couple of pairs.
My glittens. I believe that they're hand knit, but I love them so much. I got them from Aeropostale as well and they're really comfortable.
I believe this bag says it all. This was from my mom, and in it was the money. The day turned out to be a HUGE one, and it was definitely because of her and her heart.
From left to right: Buffy, Season Nine comic #3, Rihanna's Talk that Talk (which was free after I signed up for my new phone plan), A notebook from Barnes and Noble, Coach Poppy/Poppy Flower Rollerball Duo from Sephora, Two Hello Kitty Shiny Gel Ink Pens, SanDisk 4GB SDHC memory card, Organic Lavender Hand Sanitizer Spray from Williams-Sonoma, Nick (my new iPhone 4s) with his plaid case.
September 29, 2011
Spend-a-Palooza, 2011 (Part Une)
I hadn't really mentioned it much, but I went on my semi-annual spend-a-palooza last Thursday. For those of you who are new to this blog, I get a financial aid refund every semester. I call it semi-annual because for the most part, it only happens twice a year (although it happened three times this year because I wanted to do a summer semester at school). Anyway, when I get my financial aid refund, I normally get some fun stuff (depending on if I don't need anything serious), use the money for big ticket items I can't afford (i.e: a new computer) or something really important like moving.
This semester was a "big ticket item" check, which has pretty much been the case the last three autumns in a row (yes, I count my iPod Touch as a big ticket item). In this case, I needed a new computer. I had been sharing my old one since I bought it two years ago and the touch-pad was starting to go. Except for that, it was still in pretty good shape but I was still ready for a new computer. I also needed new shoes (which I don't really buy until they're kaput), a smaller purse and a smaller wallet. After all of that, I had planned on getting a Kindle (which I was supposed to get in the Summer and didn't) and some books for it, besides paying bills (which is something I always do with each and every check).
The check arrived late (better late than never) and I rushed to the bank so I could get a money order for my rent (and I can't drive, so imagine how long a bus may take when you're trying to hurry). After getting rebuffed at a mall branch of my mother's bank, I scampered down to my bank to deposit some money in my savings and checking accounts. From there, I jumped on the bus to get my computer.
Let me state for the record that I actually did not get my computer first. See, I had a system, a written down system that told me which way to go and how to get exactly what I needed done. With this system, I did not stop at any other stores and that enabled me to save as much money as possible because I had a large amount of cash with me and was determined not to spend it all before I grabbed the computer and peripherals at Best Buy. Now, back to the recap.
My first stop was the Apple Store...
It was not planned that the Apple Store was supposed to be my first stop but I decided to go to the stores that were in the line as to which I was heading. The bus dropped me off in front of Macy's and after walking through Macy's, the Apple Store happened to be the closest store that was in the system. So, I went in and I was amazed by the awesome. That store was full of awesome, so much awesome I still can't describe the awesome that rubbed off on me (and I was only there to extend my warranty from the extended Best Buy coverage to AppleCare). First off, I was never told that these people actually utilize iPads for transactions and even though I had to wait a bit for it, I was also never told that the register was hidden inside of the tables that displayed the Apple products. I'm disappointed in you people because had I know how much awesome Apple Stores were full of, I wouldn't have been convinced that they were going to become the new Skynet.
After the Apple Store was Aldo. This destination was part of the plan, but not a definite part. Nevertheless, I went in and found the handbag that I wanted at the discounted price which was on the internet. Here's a couple of pictures of my new bag.
(Source)
This is called Wedgeworth and this bag is so wonderful. It's small but spacey and classic yet sporty. It has so many secret compartments. Plus, it was $29.98 on sale. I. love. this. bag. I mean, really love this bag.
Upwards and onwards, I went to Williams-Sonoma, which is like a porn shop for me. I mean, if you think about the wonderful smells that fill the store and all of the sauces and oils and seasonings and cooking tools...I'm getting off track.
Despite all of the things I wanted to take home with me, I only ended up with some Cherry Cola soda syrup and some chili starter.
(Source)
These things are the real deal. I love Williams-Sonoma soda syrup. All you need to do is shake and add about a 1/3 cup. Then, you pour seltzer water in and mix slightly to get Wild Cherry Pepsi type soda. I had bought the lemon-lime soda syrup last year and was in love with it. The cherry cola is slightly better, though.
The only way I will make chili at home is using this chili starter. It's very easy to use and though it takes a while to cook, the end result is so delicious. Williams-Sonoma also has White Chicken Chili Starter, Ultimate Taco Starter and Beef Stew Starter. I highly recommend buying this stuff. It is completely a chef's dream.
After Williams-Sonoma, I hit the second floor of the mall, where I needed to get my shoes. I ended up with my smaller wallet from American Eagle Outfitters. It's a men's wallet, but I'm enhancing my eclectic style. So, here it goes.
(Source)
There isn't any place to hold my coins, but I have a special spot in my new bag for that. This wallet rocks. It has two separate wallets, one to hold my cards and money and another smaller one to hold my school ID/U-Pass, state ID and my other important cards. I also got a really nice cross for my mom and she's been wearing it (which is a good thing).
After American Eagle Outfitters, I walked down to Payless to get my shoes. The only hitch was that they didn't have the shoes I wanted. I thought about panicking, but I didn't. Instead, I ended up with some better shoes that were $15 cheaper than the shoes I had wanted and cuter. With the extra money, I bought some inexpensive shoelaces that make me feel so sunshine-y. Here's a look (after the shoelaces were replaced).
Cute, aren't they? I love the houndstooth/checkered lining on the inside, which you can see at the top. I also got them about a size and a half larger so they're a little more comfortable and easy to put on/take off. I have worn them almost every day since buying them.
After buying the shoes, I skedaddled from the mall as fast as could in fear or spending the rest of my money on things I didn't need (read: Crate and Barrel, Pottery Barn and Restoration Hardware last year). From the mall, I crossed the vast, really huge parking lot (dodging cars, of course) to get to Best Buy.
Best Buy was a trip and a half. I was on a roll, a really great roll but at the same time, I was tired and a little pissed that these two overly dramatic women that were flirting like hell and not as cute as I am (not trying to be vain, just trying to be honest) were being helped by everyone but the owner of the store. To make matters worse, the computer I was originally supposed to get was not there. They only had the floor model and we all know how you're not supposed to buy the floor model. So, I had a choice to make, to leave computer-less or to buy the computer I had planned to get months ago and spend the extra $180 or so. It took me at least 15 minutes to half an hour to figure it out, but I ended up spending the extra money to get the computer I wanted (and later got my $30 back when the computer went on sale this week). Here is what it looks like at home.
I am not disappointed at all with this computer. She's fast, beautiful, repels fingerprints and just amazing all around. I did end up having to buy MS Office, but I got the MS Office Suite 2010 Professional for $99.95 from the website because of my student discount. I love this computer, and I love that my mom now has her own computer. I actually named her Bella, and my mom named her computer Edward (*giggle-snort*)
Along with the computer, I got a couple of Sims 3 expansion packs: Generations and Town Life Stuff. I also got a Kindle and a beautiful leather case that was not originally on my list but was $20 cheaper. Here's what Ivy (my Kindle) looks like all dressed up.
The books I got from the Kindle store are phenomenal and I've been sampling all of them little by little, but I will talk about those tomorrow.
By the time I got home, it was close to 10 pm and I was bushed. However, I was so glad that I paid my bills and managed to get everything at the correct price or lower (with the exception of the computer). I've also put some money aside and bought some more things, which I'll post at a later time because this post is way too long to begin with. Stay tuned for tomorrow's special edition of "Book A.D.D." Until then, TTFN!
This semester was a "big ticket item" check, which has pretty much been the case the last three autumns in a row (yes, I count my iPod Touch as a big ticket item). In this case, I needed a new computer. I had been sharing my old one since I bought it two years ago and the touch-pad was starting to go. Except for that, it was still in pretty good shape but I was still ready for a new computer. I also needed new shoes (which I don't really buy until they're kaput), a smaller purse and a smaller wallet. After all of that, I had planned on getting a Kindle (which I was supposed to get in the Summer and didn't) and some books for it, besides paying bills (which is something I always do with each and every check).
The check arrived late (better late than never) and I rushed to the bank so I could get a money order for my rent (and I can't drive, so imagine how long a bus may take when you're trying to hurry). After getting rebuffed at a mall branch of my mother's bank, I scampered down to my bank to deposit some money in my savings and checking accounts. From there, I jumped on the bus to get my computer.
Let me state for the record that I actually did not get my computer first. See, I had a system, a written down system that told me which way to go and how to get exactly what I needed done. With this system, I did not stop at any other stores and that enabled me to save as much money as possible because I had a large amount of cash with me and was determined not to spend it all before I grabbed the computer and peripherals at Best Buy. Now, back to the recap.
My first stop was the Apple Store...
It was not planned that the Apple Store was supposed to be my first stop but I decided to go to the stores that were in the line as to which I was heading. The bus dropped me off in front of Macy's and after walking through Macy's, the Apple Store happened to be the closest store that was in the system. So, I went in and I was amazed by the awesome. That store was full of awesome, so much awesome I still can't describe the awesome that rubbed off on me (and I was only there to extend my warranty from the extended Best Buy coverage to AppleCare). First off, I was never told that these people actually utilize iPads for transactions and even though I had to wait a bit for it, I was also never told that the register was hidden inside of the tables that displayed the Apple products. I'm disappointed in you people because had I know how much awesome Apple Stores were full of, I wouldn't have been convinced that they were going to become the new Skynet.
After the Apple Store was Aldo. This destination was part of the plan, but not a definite part. Nevertheless, I went in and found the handbag that I wanted at the discounted price which was on the internet. Here's a couple of pictures of my new bag.
(Source)
This is called Wedgeworth and this bag is so wonderful. It's small but spacey and classic yet sporty. It has so many secret compartments. Plus, it was $29.98 on sale. I. love. this. bag. I mean, really love this bag.
Upwards and onwards, I went to Williams-Sonoma, which is like a porn shop for me. I mean, if you think about the wonderful smells that fill the store and all of the sauces and oils and seasonings and cooking tools...I'm getting off track.
Despite all of the things I wanted to take home with me, I only ended up with some Cherry Cola soda syrup and some chili starter.
(Source)
These things are the real deal. I love Williams-Sonoma soda syrup. All you need to do is shake and add about a 1/3 cup. Then, you pour seltzer water in and mix slightly to get Wild Cherry Pepsi type soda. I had bought the lemon-lime soda syrup last year and was in love with it. The cherry cola is slightly better, though.
The only way I will make chili at home is using this chili starter. It's very easy to use and though it takes a while to cook, the end result is so delicious. Williams-Sonoma also has White Chicken Chili Starter, Ultimate Taco Starter and Beef Stew Starter. I highly recommend buying this stuff. It is completely a chef's dream.
After Williams-Sonoma, I hit the second floor of the mall, where I needed to get my shoes. I ended up with my smaller wallet from American Eagle Outfitters. It's a men's wallet, but I'm enhancing my eclectic style. So, here it goes.
(Source)
There isn't any place to hold my coins, but I have a special spot in my new bag for that. This wallet rocks. It has two separate wallets, one to hold my cards and money and another smaller one to hold my school ID/U-Pass, state ID and my other important cards. I also got a really nice cross for my mom and she's been wearing it (which is a good thing).
After American Eagle Outfitters, I walked down to Payless to get my shoes. The only hitch was that they didn't have the shoes I wanted. I thought about panicking, but I didn't. Instead, I ended up with some better shoes that were $15 cheaper than the shoes I had wanted and cuter. With the extra money, I bought some inexpensive shoelaces that make me feel so sunshine-y. Here's a look (after the shoelaces were replaced).
Cute, aren't they? I love the houndstooth/checkered lining on the inside, which you can see at the top. I also got them about a size and a half larger so they're a little more comfortable and easy to put on/take off. I have worn them almost every day since buying them.
After buying the shoes, I skedaddled from the mall as fast as could in fear or spending the rest of my money on things I didn't need (read: Crate and Barrel, Pottery Barn and Restoration Hardware last year). From the mall, I crossed the vast, really huge parking lot (dodging cars, of course) to get to Best Buy.
Best Buy was a trip and a half. I was on a roll, a really great roll but at the same time, I was tired and a little pissed that these two overly dramatic women that were flirting like hell and not as cute as I am (not trying to be vain, just trying to be honest) were being helped by everyone but the owner of the store. To make matters worse, the computer I was originally supposed to get was not there. They only had the floor model and we all know how you're not supposed to buy the floor model. So, I had a choice to make, to leave computer-less or to buy the computer I had planned to get months ago and spend the extra $180 or so. It took me at least 15 minutes to half an hour to figure it out, but I ended up spending the extra money to get the computer I wanted (and later got my $30 back when the computer went on sale this week). Here is what it looks like at home.
I am not disappointed at all with this computer. She's fast, beautiful, repels fingerprints and just amazing all around. I did end up having to buy MS Office, but I got the MS Office Suite 2010 Professional for $99.95 from the website because of my student discount. I love this computer, and I love that my mom now has her own computer. I actually named her Bella, and my mom named her computer Edward (*giggle-snort*)
Along with the computer, I got a couple of Sims 3 expansion packs: Generations and Town Life Stuff. I also got a Kindle and a beautiful leather case that was not originally on my list but was $20 cheaper. Here's what Ivy (my Kindle) looks like all dressed up.
The books I got from the Kindle store are phenomenal and I've been sampling all of them little by little, but I will talk about those tomorrow.
By the time I got home, it was close to 10 pm and I was bushed. However, I was so glad that I paid my bills and managed to get everything at the correct price or lower (with the exception of the computer). I've also put some money aside and bought some more things, which I'll post at a later time because this post is way too long to begin with. Stay tuned for tomorrow's special edition of "Book A.D.D." Until then, TTFN!
September 23, 2011
With a Bang!
Yesterday and today provided some much needed...something in my life. I learned that I still had to learn that patience is a virtue and even on the days when I don't have patience, I can still surprise myself. I learned that following a list is great and even when randomness steers you away from it, it's okay to improvise. I also learned that lemonade can be a whole lot sweeter and that yes, I really need to stop making definitive statements because I'm wrong about them a good chunk of the time.
I had planned for this post to have pictures, but I would rather wait for that. Instead, I'm just going to get into some of what happened. I'll start with the Times.
For those of you who don't know, I write for my school paper, The MATC Times. I'm in my second semester of writing their now and on my way to becoming one of the editors. Anyway, I wrote an article on Monday that I didn't edit and I pretty much wrote and sent on its way. I was prepared to get scolded or, at the least, be told that my article had been heavily edited when I went into the office yesterday. None of those things happen. In fact, Wayne, the new Editor in Chief, was not there. So, I browsed around and looked at the mock-ups and layout of how the paper was going to look next week, and found my article (the same one I wrote and shipped out) on the front page. It's not just on the front page, either. It's the lead front page article of the issue. Crazy, right? I've been doing a little jig ever since.
The newspaper-y goodness doesn't stop there, either. Today was the official newspaper meeting (which is every other Friday and I really don't need to go, but I did today). I was running on four hours of sleep, so I went in there prepared to just sit and watch and not pick up an assignment. Well, I perked up as much as I could on that little sleep and ended up being assigned an article on my old job (or current job, of which I'm on a hiatus so it's not really a conflict of interest). I am covering the Salon services at my school, so I was happy about it and I did tell Wayne that I was prepared not to do anything. Wayne is a sweetie, because he looked at me and asked multiple times if I was sure I wanted to do it so I said yeah. Then, Bob pulled me into the office...
...and told me that I was officially being offered a spot on the Orlando trip. Guess who said yes? Yep, that was me. He's going to email me the details, but mostly everything is being paid for (hotel, airfare, food) and all I have to do is go to a convention.
Everything at the meeting was really nice. I met some of the newbies and was called a protégé, Bob's to be exact. All of this has me thinking that maybe my big career field is supposed to be somewhere in the writing field. Even though I said I didn't want to have a career in that field, everything's pretty much leading me into it and maybe that's not so bad after all.
In other writing news, I managed to get my Intro to Foodservice/Hospitality Industry teacher to do an interview for The Fooderati. I'm emailing him the question, so I hope he gives me some good answers.
Shopping. Shopping is not anything close to how fun it used to be when I was 23 and never been to college before. This time, I decided to be a little more fiscally responsible than I was earlier this year and it worked. I had a list and although a few changes were made, I managed to get everything I wrote down. I got a new computer and a kindle and most of all, paid some bills that really needed to be paid. Overall, I've also saved some money as well as signed up for dental insurance. I think this is going to be a fairly awesome fall.
I had planned for this post to have pictures, but I would rather wait for that. Instead, I'm just going to get into some of what happened. I'll start with the Times.
For those of you who don't know, I write for my school paper, The MATC Times. I'm in my second semester of writing their now and on my way to becoming one of the editors. Anyway, I wrote an article on Monday that I didn't edit and I pretty much wrote and sent on its way. I was prepared to get scolded or, at the least, be told that my article had been heavily edited when I went into the office yesterday. None of those things happen. In fact, Wayne, the new Editor in Chief, was not there. So, I browsed around and looked at the mock-ups and layout of how the paper was going to look next week, and found my article (the same one I wrote and shipped out) on the front page. It's not just on the front page, either. It's the lead front page article of the issue. Crazy, right? I've been doing a little jig ever since.
The newspaper-y goodness doesn't stop there, either. Today was the official newspaper meeting (which is every other Friday and I really don't need to go, but I did today). I was running on four hours of sleep, so I went in there prepared to just sit and watch and not pick up an assignment. Well, I perked up as much as I could on that little sleep and ended up being assigned an article on my old job (or current job, of which I'm on a hiatus so it's not really a conflict of interest). I am covering the Salon services at my school, so I was happy about it and I did tell Wayne that I was prepared not to do anything. Wayne is a sweetie, because he looked at me and asked multiple times if I was sure I wanted to do it so I said yeah. Then, Bob pulled me into the office...
...and told me that I was officially being offered a spot on the Orlando trip. Guess who said yes? Yep, that was me. He's going to email me the details, but mostly everything is being paid for (hotel, airfare, food) and all I have to do is go to a convention.
Everything at the meeting was really nice. I met some of the newbies and was called a protégé, Bob's to be exact. All of this has me thinking that maybe my big career field is supposed to be somewhere in the writing field. Even though I said I didn't want to have a career in that field, everything's pretty much leading me into it and maybe that's not so bad after all.
In other writing news, I managed to get my Intro to Foodservice/Hospitality Industry teacher to do an interview for The Fooderati. I'm emailing him the question, so I hope he gives me some good answers.
Shopping. Shopping is not anything close to how fun it used to be when I was 23 and never been to college before. This time, I decided to be a little more fiscally responsible than I was earlier this year and it worked. I had a list and although a few changes were made, I managed to get everything I wrote down. I got a new computer and a kindle and most of all, paid some bills that really needed to be paid. Overall, I've also saved some money as well as signed up for dental insurance. I think this is going to be a fairly awesome fall.
September 6, 2011
...as I know it, week #33
School...as I know it: This week is third week of school and it's still going well. I'm feeling a bit of burn out from my Summer semester, but I'm determined to keep going. In my Intro to Foodservice class, I had to interview a foodservice professional and I ended up interview Nicole at La Buena Vida. If you haven't been to her blog, please go there now! She was super awesome and patient when I asked her to do the interview, even though I didn't have the questions on me. She also answered them right away and the answers were thorough. Although I'm not supposed to submit the interview until next week, I have to bring in to my teacher to see if everything is up to snuff but I am so grateful for her help and I'm sure that I'm going to get an A, thanks to her.
I watched Casablanca for my Intro to Film class this weekend and I actually really liked it. I had never seen it before and even though I fell asleep (it had nothing to do with the movie), I still got to see why it was a classic. My film class has me watching some really great movies like Limitless or Run Lola Run, Inception, Alice in Wonderland (the Johnny Depp version) and more. I'm still trying to get into my French class, but I'm feeling generally fatigued. I'll get over that by mid-semester.
Writing...as I know it: I made a stop by the Times office today to talk to my new editor and he loved the edited version of the article. I think he was surprised that I also took his edits to heart and used them. I'm not very critical when anyone's editing my stuff because I know they're doing it to make me a better writer, plus I really like the red pen. I don't know why, but I do. I also think that Wayne will be very surprised that I am very cooperative when it comes to my articles being edited. This is still my second semester at the Times and while I may be on the track of being an editor, that doesn't mean in any way that I'm going to be cocky at all about how good I may be. I want to learn (in the voice of Simon Tam from Firefly).
Meanwhile, I have changed the title of my book series. For the longest time (I think five years or so), it has been called The Enchantress Chronicles, and I thought that would always be the title of the series as a whole. However, I decided to go with a title that goes along with the differing titles of the books [I have planned in my head so far}, so it's now called the Collide series. Collide is the first book in the [planned] series and I think this goes better with the series and the characters because the basis of the book(s) [initially] is that the life of one character collides with the group of other characters through this wild series of events that [plans to] span ten years. This is something I had been meaning to blog about for at least a couple of months, but never got around to doing.
In other writing news, I still have been going back and forth about creating a food blog because I really want to make sure that I can commit to it, but I do want to write more about food and how it's significant in my life. If you guys are interested, please discuss the pros and cons about this in the comments section.
Money...as I know it: I don't know if I ever mentioned this in my blog, but I haven't had a full time job since a week after I got married even though I have worked. While this is really pretty bad financially, my mother has this firm belief that I am not supposed to get a full time job until I am done with school. I've been fighting this notion for a while now, but it is pretty true since I've applied to possibly hundreds of jobs (some more than once), including McDonalds and Starbucks, and hardly got any callbacks for interviews.
I don't mind going to school. I actually enjoy it a lot, but I still feel like there should be more of me pulling my weight financially (and I do, just not as often as I would with a full time job).
Well, that notion of me getting paid to go to school planted itself a little bit deeper in my head this weekend. I've mentioned that I haven't returned to my job yet due to being on the wait list for work-study and I didn't understand what was going on at first but then, $1,000 extra dollars showed up on my financial aid award letter.
I got an extra grant, which I'd applied for back in January, and I'm getting $500 more a semester now. I think this is truly a blessing and I was super happy about it when I found out. So, I guess I'm going to let the job go until my number is up on the wait list and my classes are paid for, which will be next week. I'm still super happy about the grant because I didn't think I was going to get it and there are some pretty stringent qualifications in getting the grant, so it's almost like a scholarship but not. Either way, I feel blessed about it and I'm super grateful.
Life...as I know it: I'm still [technically] on a sabbatical from blogging and the like until my hand gets better, but this is hard. I have so much going on that I want to talk so much about, so I'm going to take it one day at a time and see my doctor on Friday to see if it is a strain, or if I broke something (my x-rays point to no) or if it's arthritis (which may be likely). In the meantime, life is busy but good and I wouldn't trade it for the world.
I watched Casablanca for my Intro to Film class this weekend and I actually really liked it. I had never seen it before and even though I fell asleep (it had nothing to do with the movie), I still got to see why it was a classic. My film class has me watching some really great movies like Limitless or Run Lola Run, Inception, Alice in Wonderland (the Johnny Depp version) and more. I'm still trying to get into my French class, but I'm feeling generally fatigued. I'll get over that by mid-semester.
Writing...as I know it: I made a stop by the Times office today to talk to my new editor and he loved the edited version of the article. I think he was surprised that I also took his edits to heart and used them. I'm not very critical when anyone's editing my stuff because I know they're doing it to make me a better writer, plus I really like the red pen. I don't know why, but I do. I also think that Wayne will be very surprised that I am very cooperative when it comes to my articles being edited. This is still my second semester at the Times and while I may be on the track of being an editor, that doesn't mean in any way that I'm going to be cocky at all about how good I may be. I want to learn (in the voice of Simon Tam from Firefly).
Meanwhile, I have changed the title of my book series. For the longest time (I think five years or so), it has been called The Enchantress Chronicles, and I thought that would always be the title of the series as a whole. However, I decided to go with a title that goes along with the differing titles of the books [I have planned in my head so far}, so it's now called the Collide series. Collide is the first book in the [planned] series and I think this goes better with the series and the characters because the basis of the book(s) [initially] is that the life of one character collides with the group of other characters through this wild series of events that [plans to] span ten years. This is something I had been meaning to blog about for at least a couple of months, but never got around to doing.
In other writing news, I still have been going back and forth about creating a food blog because I really want to make sure that I can commit to it, but I do want to write more about food and how it's significant in my life. If you guys are interested, please discuss the pros and cons about this in the comments section.
Money...as I know it: I don't know if I ever mentioned this in my blog, but I haven't had a full time job since a week after I got married even though I have worked. While this is really pretty bad financially, my mother has this firm belief that I am not supposed to get a full time job until I am done with school. I've been fighting this notion for a while now, but it is pretty true since I've applied to possibly hundreds of jobs (some more than once), including McDonalds and Starbucks, and hardly got any callbacks for interviews.
I don't mind going to school. I actually enjoy it a lot, but I still feel like there should be more of me pulling my weight financially (and I do, just not as often as I would with a full time job).
Well, that notion of me getting paid to go to school planted itself a little bit deeper in my head this weekend. I've mentioned that I haven't returned to my job yet due to being on the wait list for work-study and I didn't understand what was going on at first but then, $1,000 extra dollars showed up on my financial aid award letter.
I got an extra grant, which I'd applied for back in January, and I'm getting $500 more a semester now. I think this is truly a blessing and I was super happy about it when I found out. So, I guess I'm going to let the job go until my number is up on the wait list and my classes are paid for, which will be next week. I'm still super happy about the grant because I didn't think I was going to get it and there are some pretty stringent qualifications in getting the grant, so it's almost like a scholarship but not. Either way, I feel blessed about it and I'm super grateful.
Life...as I know it: I'm still [technically] on a sabbatical from blogging and the like until my hand gets better, but this is hard. I have so much going on that I want to talk so much about, so I'm going to take it one day at a time and see my doctor on Friday to see if it is a strain, or if I broke something (my x-rays point to no) or if it's arthritis (which may be likely). In the meantime, life is busy but good and I wouldn't trade it for the world.
August 30, 2011
...as I know it, week #32
Money...as I know it: I have an issue with money. See, I get it and then it disappears all too quickly, and not on the good stuff like candy or Coach handbags. I have all these great plans (or had, depending on when the idea popped up) and I'm a little afraid to put them into fruition because I just have this feeling that the money will be gone if I do it or before I do it. Between bills and eating (because people need to do that) and important things like toilet paper, I am flat ass broke by the middle of the next week. I don't like that. I really don't. It makes being a grown up feel like Hell, if Hell had differing temperatures that range from cool to hot and had seasons and had the majority of the people in the world.
This is something I don't even think that I can put on lack of self control. Yes, the price of notebooks are just plain astronomical now, but I don't think it's a problem if that's the only thing I get. I blame inflation and the sucky economy but I don't blame the notebooks.
School...as I know it: One week down, fifteen more to go. Yesterday, I was feeling ridiculously lost but now I feel a little more confident and more like my head is on straight. If I can continue to feel this way throughout the next three months and three weeks (without the aid of medication), that would be perfect.
I was assessing all of the extracurricular activities I had participated in during my entire school career and I think it was, like, three and a half, not counting the newspaper. Now, I feel like I'm overcompensating in a good way because I'm closer to 30 than 20 and in some aspects of my life, I am just good at some things and bad at others. Classwork is something I'm good at. Controlling the urge to nosh on an entire pack of Twizzlers in one sitting is something I'm bad at. Get the picture?
Work...as I know it: I think I figured out what I want to do with my life, and I'm almost 90% sure that it is not writing. Being a mother (getting pregnant and all) is something I'm 100% sure I want to do but writing? Hell, no.
Here's how I came to this conclusion. I thought about having a job writing and did not like the outlook. It may work for some people who want to become professional in some area of it but then, it's no longer a hobby or passion. It's a job to write by a deadline and sometimes publicize that writing and sometimes defend it because there is always someone who will hate it. I want to continue to love writing for as long as I possibly can and while a publishing deal would be great, I worry that I'll eventually grow to hate my characters and my world and my stories because it has become a full time job. I would rather be a mom and work at a 9-5 until I am ready to share my stories with the world. That, however, is not to say that I am against teaching writers to enhance their writing, be it in college or in another venue. That would be fun.
Love...as I know it: I've been thinking about my long distance marriage and I realized that nobody thinks of that as brave. A long distance marriage is thought of as a divorce waiting to happen (I could be wrong. Discuss in the comments), but I think that the long distance is what kept me and T together for as long as we have been (3 years and counting). See, he likes his space and I like mine. He likes his freedom and I like mine. Oddly enough, he's very transparent, so I can pretty much assure myself that there is no third parties in my relationship. The distance makes us awesome because when we are together, there are still fireworks.
I do miss him. I am being completely honest when I say that I miss him and this wasn't what I'd expected but somehow, we make it work. My marriage still shocks my mother (because we are still married). I don't encourage this for everyone but for now it works. So, I hope to change everyone's opinion about long distance marriage (again, I could be wrong) because it kept me and T together.
The End...as I know it: I am done with week 1 of classes, but I am entering week 2 in a couple of days. Wish me luck and wish that I continue to remain sane. Until then, see you tomorrow.
This is something I don't even think that I can put on lack of self control. Yes, the price of notebooks are just plain astronomical now, but I don't think it's a problem if that's the only thing I get. I blame inflation and the sucky economy but I don't blame the notebooks.
School...as I know it: One week down, fifteen more to go. Yesterday, I was feeling ridiculously lost but now I feel a little more confident and more like my head is on straight. If I can continue to feel this way throughout the next three months and three weeks (without the aid of medication), that would be perfect.
I was assessing all of the extracurricular activities I had participated in during my entire school career and I think it was, like, three and a half, not counting the newspaper. Now, I feel like I'm overcompensating in a good way because I'm closer to 30 than 20 and in some aspects of my life, I am just good at some things and bad at others. Classwork is something I'm good at. Controlling the urge to nosh on an entire pack of Twizzlers in one sitting is something I'm bad at. Get the picture?
Work...as I know it: I think I figured out what I want to do with my life, and I'm almost 90% sure that it is not writing. Being a mother (getting pregnant and all) is something I'm 100% sure I want to do but writing? Hell, no.
Here's how I came to this conclusion. I thought about having a job writing and did not like the outlook. It may work for some people who want to become professional in some area of it but then, it's no longer a hobby or passion. It's a job to write by a deadline and sometimes publicize that writing and sometimes defend it because there is always someone who will hate it. I want to continue to love writing for as long as I possibly can and while a publishing deal would be great, I worry that I'll eventually grow to hate my characters and my world and my stories because it has become a full time job. I would rather be a mom and work at a 9-5 until I am ready to share my stories with the world. That, however, is not to say that I am against teaching writers to enhance their writing, be it in college or in another venue. That would be fun.
Love...as I know it: I've been thinking about my long distance marriage and I realized that nobody thinks of that as brave. A long distance marriage is thought of as a divorce waiting to happen (I could be wrong. Discuss in the comments), but I think that the long distance is what kept me and T together for as long as we have been (3 years and counting). See, he likes his space and I like mine. He likes his freedom and I like mine. Oddly enough, he's very transparent, so I can pretty much assure myself that there is no third parties in my relationship. The distance makes us awesome because when we are together, there are still fireworks.
I do miss him. I am being completely honest when I say that I miss him and this wasn't what I'd expected but somehow, we make it work. My marriage still shocks my mother (because we are still married). I don't encourage this for everyone but for now it works. So, I hope to change everyone's opinion about long distance marriage (again, I could be wrong) because it kept me and T together.
The End...as I know it: I am done with week 1 of classes, but I am entering week 2 in a couple of days. Wish me luck and wish that I continue to remain sane. Until then, see you tomorrow.
July 1, 2011
Up In The Air
(Author's Note: If you think I'm going to start talking about the George Clooney movie by the director of "Juno," you're in the wrong place.)
My life has been in a sort of crisis that I haven't been talking about to anyone other than my mother (and this is one of the reasons why I'll be so devastated when she passes on). In a stunning twist, I think that this crisis is a good thing.
Since I moved out and ventured out into the "Real World," a great deal of my future was planned (by myself). I'd started a job I liked. I'd planned on becoming a permanent employee and going to college at the same time to get my prerequisites done so I could finish my Education degree at UW-Milwaukee. Then, I met T.
After meeting T, I ended up dating him, getting engaged, moving out, not going to classes and then getting fired. Still, my bigger picture didn't change that much. I went to another school, moved out from my first apartment and then moved into another one, got married and dealt with some huge family issues. I still had the bigger picture in mind. It was just a matter of getting to it and how long it was going to take. To be honest, my life had gone from zero to 100, to hell and back, and I still had the intentions of keeping my bigger picture intact. I wanted to become a teacher and even when I entered academic probation, I just fought harder for it.
Then, things started to change earlier this year. The big picture had started to change. It went from wanting to become a teacher to wanting to possibly study English or Journalism. I continued on in my Spring classes with increasing disinterest, especially in my Issues in Urban Teaching class. It was so sudden, but it happened. Nevertheless, I wasn't too worried because I still had a plan. I was going to study English and if that didn't work out, I was going to finish my Liberal Arts degree and then study Culinary Arts.
Until the last time I saw my guidance counselor.
It was on my first day back at work last month that he told me to not even finish the Liberal Arts degree and to go straight to Culinary Arts. It was so straightforward, he actually ushered me to the office of the Culinary Arts guidance counselor. It was there that I signed up for it, even though there's a waiting list and I would most likely not be officially in the program until Spring.
Since then, I've gone back and forth on whether that was the right thing for me, but I haven't changed it yet. In fact, I'm anticipating it. Even though my left arm comes and goes with pain, I'm anticipating it. However, I'm also anticipating living in the moment. None of my decisions seem so set in stone anymore. I do things when I decide to do them and only if I really want to do it (besides the times when I really need to do something important). My living situation no longer feels dire and even though I have a plan, there's not really a time frame. There's really no time frame for anything I wanted to do anymore, except children because I would like to have one before I'm 30. Still, it's alright if my baby comes on or after my 30th birthday. I'm really flying by the seat of my pants right now, and not even the Everything Binder is being utilized as much as it should be. Traveling is something I still want to do, but I've also been taking some pictures around Milwaukee, and I want to do more of that before I jump on a plane.
I don't know if this is liberation or becoming a Culinary Arts major was just the push to make me do something I wanted to do anyway. I did think it was a little crazy at first and I was so nervous about it, but I've grown to love living with a little more uncertainty, a little less worry and neurosis.
My life has been in a sort of crisis that I haven't been talking about to anyone other than my mother (and this is one of the reasons why I'll be so devastated when she passes on). In a stunning twist, I think that this crisis is a good thing.
Since I moved out and ventured out into the "Real World," a great deal of my future was planned (by myself). I'd started a job I liked. I'd planned on becoming a permanent employee and going to college at the same time to get my prerequisites done so I could finish my Education degree at UW-Milwaukee. Then, I met T.
After meeting T, I ended up dating him, getting engaged, moving out, not going to classes and then getting fired. Still, my bigger picture didn't change that much. I went to another school, moved out from my first apartment and then moved into another one, got married and dealt with some huge family issues. I still had the bigger picture in mind. It was just a matter of getting to it and how long it was going to take. To be honest, my life had gone from zero to 100, to hell and back, and I still had the intentions of keeping my bigger picture intact. I wanted to become a teacher and even when I entered academic probation, I just fought harder for it.
Then, things started to change earlier this year. The big picture had started to change. It went from wanting to become a teacher to wanting to possibly study English or Journalism. I continued on in my Spring classes with increasing disinterest, especially in my Issues in Urban Teaching class. It was so sudden, but it happened. Nevertheless, I wasn't too worried because I still had a plan. I was going to study English and if that didn't work out, I was going to finish my Liberal Arts degree and then study Culinary Arts.
Until the last time I saw my guidance counselor.
It was on my first day back at work last month that he told me to not even finish the Liberal Arts degree and to go straight to Culinary Arts. It was so straightforward, he actually ushered me to the office of the Culinary Arts guidance counselor. It was there that I signed up for it, even though there's a waiting list and I would most likely not be officially in the program until Spring.
Since then, I've gone back and forth on whether that was the right thing for me, but I haven't changed it yet. In fact, I'm anticipating it. Even though my left arm comes and goes with pain, I'm anticipating it. However, I'm also anticipating living in the moment. None of my decisions seem so set in stone anymore. I do things when I decide to do them and only if I really want to do it (besides the times when I really need to do something important). My living situation no longer feels dire and even though I have a plan, there's not really a time frame. There's really no time frame for anything I wanted to do anymore, except children because I would like to have one before I'm 30. Still, it's alright if my baby comes on or after my 30th birthday. I'm really flying by the seat of my pants right now, and not even the Everything Binder is being utilized as much as it should be. Traveling is something I still want to do, but I've also been taking some pictures around Milwaukee, and I want to do more of that before I jump on a plane.
I don't know if this is liberation or becoming a Culinary Arts major was just the push to make me do something I wanted to do anyway. I did think it was a little crazy at first and I was so nervous about it, but I've grown to love living with a little more uncertainty, a little less worry and neurosis.
June 21, 2011
Need vs. Want
I realized today that I am in the process of relearning certain things. This may seem odd, but it's really quite simple. My brain is re-training itself to enjoy certain things but also see it for what it is, particularly when it comes to buying things and certain impulses. Let me give some examples.
Impulses
Original thought: "I need to blog."
Re-trained thought: "I don't feel like blogging and I really don't have much to say. I'm going to take a break for a couple of days."
The re-trained thought comes easy to about 98% of bloggers around the world. As for me, I have perpetual guilt and if I normally go a couple of days without saying something, I feel bad. Lately (i.e: the last couple of days), I've been blogging about a couple of things, but it's more of a passing thought. I don't sit and edit the posts a dozen times between the time I've finished with it and the time I finally post it. My mind is more concerned on class and work and more pressing issues going on right now.
Original thought: "(insert name here) has gotten this, this and this (use your imagination). Why can't I be/have/do what (insert name here) is/has/is doing?"
Re-trained thought: "(insert name here) is doing this, this and this (use your imagination). Good for them."
This is not sarcasm or indifference. This is also still a work in progress because if you read this, you'll see where my laziness has gotten me and why I have been comparing myself to other women my age that are more successful. While these same women have not lived through the last five years of my life, there's still the feeling that I should be caught up with them, or there used to be (and an inkling is still there, let's be realistic). In the meantime, I have other things on my mind, as I had previously stated. I'm more concerned about making myself more stable right now. Now that I am studying Culinary Arts and will be until I graduate, I have to make sure that my arms are up for the task. I have to make sure that this is something that I do want to do and can do for as long as possible. The pinched nerve in my left wrist has thrown me off and the confidence in my decision wanes because I'm relying more on my right arm, which means it's only a matter of time before my right arm gives out if it's not taken care of ASAP. I never realized that I needed my left arm as much as I know I do now. Needless to say, I can't afford the time to think about someone else's life right now.
Original Thought: "OMG! I know that girl. She's a blogger and I must talk to her!"
Re-trained Thought: "Do I really want to make a fool out of myself and come up to some strange woman to tell her I love her blog and I knew her baby from all of the pictures she's posted of him?"
It's not a blogger's fault if she's posting pics of her baby. I would be, too, if I had an adorable baby. This is more of a situation where I am wondering how insane I would look ranting about someone's blog in the middle of a Target. I actually did see this blogger today at Target and I told my sister where I'd seen her, but she looked like she'd come out from a run and I didn't want to embarrass myself. Plus, I don't know if I would want someone to come up to me and tell me how much they like my blog, especially if they're lurking and have never commented. I would be a little nervous and stunned at first. So, I am learning that moderation is key and if I encounter someone whose blog I've read, I think I'm going to make sure they know who I am first.
Buying Things
Original Thought: "Ooh, a Kindle."
Original Thought #2: "Ooh, I need that Juicy Couture purse."
Original Thought #3: "I am going to go insane at this makeup counter."
Original Thought #4: "OMG, a DSLR!"
Original Thought #5: "Why am I at a mall where a shitload of Semi-Annual sales are going on and I'm broke?"
Re-trained Thought: "I really hope some of this stuff will be here and some of these sales will be going on when I do get some money."
Original thoughts #1-5 ran through my head today, but the re-trained thought cross my mind as well because I am learning more about moderation when it comes to things I don't need right now on top of not throwing a hissy fit for not getting what I want. My mind is now running on the fumes of the fact that I am 26 years old and I need to learn how to save before I get back out on my own and have children. Saving is a simple concept, so I need to get on the ball. I don't need a Kindle. I've actually started reading some of my old books. I will never be able to justify spending $228 on a Juicy Couture purse (even though my sister has gotten one). Makeup clogs my pores and I break out terribly, but I don't mind wearing eyeliner and eyeliner shouldn't be expensive. I've been clocking in some time with my point and shoot as well as my iPod Touch (and instagram). I love the pictures I'm taking and unless I'm going to become a food photographer, I can't really justify getting a DSLR until I am closer to getting ready to graduate school and have more money to spend. As for the semi-annual sales, I just hope they're still going on next week.
Impulses
Original thought: "I need to blog."
Re-trained thought: "I don't feel like blogging and I really don't have much to say. I'm going to take a break for a couple of days."
The re-trained thought comes easy to about 98% of bloggers around the world. As for me, I have perpetual guilt and if I normally go a couple of days without saying something, I feel bad. Lately (i.e: the last couple of days), I've been blogging about a couple of things, but it's more of a passing thought. I don't sit and edit the posts a dozen times between the time I've finished with it and the time I finally post it. My mind is more concerned on class and work and more pressing issues going on right now.
Original thought: "(insert name here) has gotten this, this and this (use your imagination). Why can't I be/have/do what (insert name here) is/has/is doing?"
Re-trained thought: "(insert name here) is doing this, this and this (use your imagination). Good for them."
This is not sarcasm or indifference. This is also still a work in progress because if you read this, you'll see where my laziness has gotten me and why I have been comparing myself to other women my age that are more successful. While these same women have not lived through the last five years of my life, there's still the feeling that I should be caught up with them, or there used to be (and an inkling is still there, let's be realistic). In the meantime, I have other things on my mind, as I had previously stated. I'm more concerned about making myself more stable right now. Now that I am studying Culinary Arts and will be until I graduate, I have to make sure that my arms are up for the task. I have to make sure that this is something that I do want to do and can do for as long as possible. The pinched nerve in my left wrist has thrown me off and the confidence in my decision wanes because I'm relying more on my right arm, which means it's only a matter of time before my right arm gives out if it's not taken care of ASAP. I never realized that I needed my left arm as much as I know I do now. Needless to say, I can't afford the time to think about someone else's life right now.
Original Thought: "OMG! I know that girl. She's a blogger and I must talk to her!"
Re-trained Thought: "Do I really want to make a fool out of myself and come up to some strange woman to tell her I love her blog and I knew her baby from all of the pictures she's posted of him?"
It's not a blogger's fault if she's posting pics of her baby. I would be, too, if I had an adorable baby. This is more of a situation where I am wondering how insane I would look ranting about someone's blog in the middle of a Target. I actually did see this blogger today at Target and I told my sister where I'd seen her, but she looked like she'd come out from a run and I didn't want to embarrass myself. Plus, I don't know if I would want someone to come up to me and tell me how much they like my blog, especially if they're lurking and have never commented. I would be a little nervous and stunned at first. So, I am learning that moderation is key and if I encounter someone whose blog I've read, I think I'm going to make sure they know who I am first.
Buying Things
Original Thought: "Ooh, a Kindle."
Original Thought #2: "Ooh, I need that Juicy Couture purse."
Original Thought #3: "I am going to go insane at this makeup counter."
Original Thought #4: "OMG, a DSLR!"
Original Thought #5: "Why am I at a mall where a shitload of Semi-Annual sales are going on and I'm broke?"
Re-trained Thought: "I really hope some of this stuff will be here and some of these sales will be going on when I do get some money."
Original thoughts #1-5 ran through my head today, but the re-trained thought cross my mind as well because I am learning more about moderation when it comes to things I don't need right now on top of not throwing a hissy fit for not getting what I want. My mind is now running on the fumes of the fact that I am 26 years old and I need to learn how to save before I get back out on my own and have children. Saving is a simple concept, so I need to get on the ball. I don't need a Kindle. I've actually started reading some of my old books. I will never be able to justify spending $228 on a Juicy Couture purse (even though my sister has gotten one). Makeup clogs my pores and I break out terribly, but I don't mind wearing eyeliner and eyeliner shouldn't be expensive. I've been clocking in some time with my point and shoot as well as my iPod Touch (and instagram). I love the pictures I'm taking and unless I'm going to become a food photographer, I can't really justify getting a DSLR until I am closer to getting ready to graduate school and have more money to spend. As for the semi-annual sales, I just hope they're still going on next week.
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The majority of the photos and all of the thoughts on this blog comes from yours truly, so be nice and ask if something interests you. Okay? Okay.